Iamthefallen's Journal: Reading resumes

Oh my gawd.

You didn't...

Why would you...?

Nononono.

Is this a normal reaction to reading resumes?

I need to bring up my own old resume and see how it compares.

Re:

[account_deleted]

Comment removed based on user account deletion

Re:

[TechnoLust]

Or at LEAST just the funny bits. And if you type a 1, I'm kicking you in the junk, because everyone knows 0 is the funniest bit. :-)

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[Tet]

Or at LEAST just the funny bits.

Highlights from some I've been reading this week:

• Achievements: #1 - captain of the University pool team
• I see you've asked for Perl, Python, LISP and Erlang in your advert. Honestly, I have no idea what those are.
• I left my last position because they didn't make use of my 23 years of IT experience (his CV listed 2 years as a first line call centre monkey, and a decade and a half stacking shelves in supermarkets)
• I am probably not the person you are looking for.
• Us: Thank

Re:

[TechnoLust]

That's classic. BTW, we went with the Chinese dude. And by we, I mean they made the decision without asking who those of us actually DOING the interviews thought was the best. *SIGH*

YES! You post now!

[ellem]

I love a bad resume. Like the Network Admin who put AIM on his resume.

Re:

[blinder]

i put "aim" on my resume.

if i can remember the blurb was:

"and when the client refused to heed my advice, i lined them up against the wall, took my revolver, pointed it at the hapless dopes and yelled: 'ready! aim! fire!!"

Re:

[ellem]

If you're apply for Camper in UT then you should list AIM as a technical skill.

snot me

[artifex2004]

of course :) I don't even know you, really. And my points died on the 8th.

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[Com2Kid]

Depends, if he wrote the protocol.... :)

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[ellem]

How could that be? It is _I_ who am the God/Emperor of Networking. Certainly I wrote the protocol, socket and invented the port 5190.

blinder - back me on this.

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[RailGunner]

I can back you up for it. I wrote a sample little app that listened to that port, and all of the sudden I got the following data repeated 666 times!

0x65 0x6C 0x6C 0x65 0x6D 0x20

weird, huh?

Yep

[nizo]

Nothing prepares you for interviewing like reading the resumes of other people. The dumb things people put on them will make you feel better if nothing else.

In the Legal Field

[Shadow Wrought]

One of the larger infractions is confusing Lexis, a massive virtual database of just about everything from legal research and newspapers, to where people live and who their neighbors are; with Lexus, a brand of cars which snobs buy to impress other snobs.

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[rk]

Please, for the love of all that's holy, tell me that lawyers don't really make this error in interviews.

Q: "What does it mean when an object is serializable?"

A: "It means I can pour milk over it and eat it for breakfast."

The recent winner

[TheConfusedOne]

As detailed here [nysun.com].

If words can't dig you a big enough hole, whip out the video camera.

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[curtisk]

I gotta see that! YouTube? Its gotta show up :)