bellus quies's Journal: Is it supposed to hurt this much?

Well.

My (ex?)boyfriend is sleeping over at his dad's place.

I'm flying out to New Mexico tomorrow morning for the weekend to hang out with my sister and get some space for us both to think about things.

We're going to talk more when I get back on Monday.

This fucking sucks.

Things have a way.....

[BWJones]

Things have a way of working themselves out for the better... Try and take the time you need right now and the distance to think and feel.

The answer is: yes.

[sillypixie]

If you had feelings for him and/or vice versa, it *should* hurt.

Be glad it does - it means you are capable of giving love and of not flippantly discarding those to whom you have given that love.

A new day will come.

Pix

Re:

[AntiFreeze]

Thanks for saying that. For both Bellus and myself (I'm going through something similar, and your words ring very true).

you're going to be fine...

[btlzu2]

i just caught up on the things you've been dealing with in your relationship. i'm SO sorry to read about this, it's heartbreaking. i don't want to lapse into any cliches, but i want you to know that to me, what you've been doing is very healthy. you have been trying your best to communicate and work things out and it takes 2 people to sort things out, not just you working your butt off.

i really think, from what i've read, that your boyfriend has some issues with his family that are preventing him from being in the relationship fully. i recognize ME from 5 years ago in him. i had to make a clean break from my family before i was ready to be in a relationship. parents and siblings should rarely have anything to do with the dynamics of a relationship if your partner is 100% in the relationship. the partner should be able to be himself completely.

i hope he sees, somehow, with some time how much he misses you. maybe that will trigger something in him that he needs to work out.... i hope you don't beat yourself up because it really looks like you've tried your best.

it will hurt, but i can see that you will be fine and if things work out with him, they will. if they don't, you'll be fine. you really will--you just might need to feel the pain for a while before it dissipates. i think we'll back you up here. :D

I'm afraid...

[FortKnox]

... from what you are telling us, that it sounds like he wants to end it, but you are still clinging on. You want to work for it, he wants to give up.
Sorry, I don't mean or want to be harsh, just giving you an outsiders opinion from the JE's you've read. You've put a lot into the relationship... you've worked hard. I hope everything works out for you in the end. Be hopeful either way. If you are together, hopefully he'll understand that he needs to put in more work than you (which sounds like quite a