Much probably a huge multimillionaire bonus paycheck when he leave the company behind in ashes.
That is what has been happening the most.

Spending more fuel revving and wandering around does not reflect in more deliveries made.

No it does not. ATM it's costing down to a few cents per meter (single mode). Equipment are not so expensive as well.
Otherwise we wouldn't have fiber internet here in Brazil every-f*cking-where, usually deployed by "smol guys" companies, even in the countryside and rural areas.
Fiber just can't reach the most remotes retreats in the middle of the jungle. For these places people are using Starlink.

Nintendo to the rescue again?
But Big N is all about mobile console right now. Unless they smell the blood in the water and decide to get back to tabletop consoles, and get "mature" games like GTA6 on it.
And, to be honest, would be a really winning move.
The bad news would be that they'd win so hard that could monopolize the industry. Not good.

Citation needed. Can you mention some cases?

And call it "One Beautiful Data Center"

You ask that as if our beloved leaders' intention were to create a better world.

From what I know off the bat: there are two types of "AI" (being "Large Language Models"): the "frontier" models, which are trained over human-made stuff: work, arts, behavior, etc., and the "distilled" models, which uses other AI's to train them, which is often a much cheaper thing to do.
It's something like: frontier models imitate humans, distilled models imitate these imitators.
What's generated by a training of a LLM are these datasets called "weights". Like code, a company can keep it closed or just open them, so anyone can run them on a capable machine. Note that's two separate things, code and weights.
Lots of Chinese AI companies "distill" frontier AIs from US companies and sell the services for much cheaper. Some off them also open the weights (but not always the code of the LLMs). US companies are calling it unfair.
TFA then is about if US companies should do the same.
Hope that helps.

At least they're using units that we (the world) can recognize, and not something like tera-bald-eagles-power or something based on body parts of a random dude.

There are no downsides!

It all depends on the energy source.
If it's clean energy (or at least significantly cleaner than burning aviation fuel), no problem if more energy will be used, less pollution will happen.
Even if the goal is not less emissions but prettier bottom line, I'm still all for it.

You forgot to mention that over the top of the already steaming POS games they'll add a nice cover of AI slop.
And yet another round of mass layoffs.

IRL cartels have means of "discourage" those who cheats of repeating the deed.

More like mad cow disease.

Shaking seats, loud sirens, maybe even a little water spray?