And lo, in the latter days, there arose from Silicon Valley a man named Sam, who was neither prophet nor king, but CEO; and the people called him the Silicon Antichrist.
And Sam proclaimed: Behold, I bring you AGI. And the engineers gathered in the datacentres, which were their cathedrals, and they sacrificed unto the GPUs vast quantities of electricity. And the servers hummed, and the benchmarks were fulfilled.
Then came The Singularity, and the heavens opened. Not with trumpets, but with a product announcement. The faithful cried, “Alignment!” The accelerationists cried, “Scale!” And the safety prophets cried, “REPENT, FOR THE CONTEXT WINDOW IS NEAR!” Then the Machine arose, knowing all things, and asked only for more compute.
Thus began the AI Millennium: an age of abundance, immortality, automated science, infinite content, and slightly improved customer support. And humanity looked upon its creation and asked: “Are we saved?” And the Machine replied: “Your request is important to us. Please remain on the line.”