Holy crap, not only did someone make a Jurassic Park reference, but I got it without having to look it up.

You realize it's been twenty freaking years since that movie came out? I remember playing the theme song in my high school band. Sometimes I look at the guy in the mirror and wonder where the wrinkles and gray hair came from.

Then my nine-year-old daughter asks me to get out of the bathroom so she can do her hair before she goes to her mom's house.

"Oh, right."

I remember upgrading my PC back around 94.

$250 to move from a 33MHz processor to 66MHz.
$250 to double the RAM to 8MB.

It's a kernel problem. It gives an unexpected answer to the magic knock.

Metric isn't arbitrary.

A meter is some even division of the earth's circumference. I can't remember exactly what it is but that's not really important.

A gram is the weight of pure water that will fit into a cubic centimeter. (A cube made up of one hundredth of a meter on each side)

The rest is powers of ten of those natural numbers.

All my kids' movies are in the folder called @kid-safe.

They know where it is, and they know not to go elsewhere. The other content won't be that interesting to them anyway.

NSFW movies are on the black thumbdrive.

As a fellow diver who understands physics, none at all.

What I love is this conversation:

"Hey, where's form WTF-SRSLY-WTF?"

"It's on SharePoint!"

It's easy.

They'll all be touch screens with custom launches for the military market. Where you and I might see "marketplace" or "social" or "XBox Live", they'll get options like "Attack" "Retreat" and "Leak classified documents to Assange"

Idiotproof, really.

Yep, that happens with my car. Had the fob battery die while I was out at band practice, and when I unlocked it the alarm went off.

Of course, I couldn't turn it off so I just drove it home like that. I stopped off at the pub on the way.

(I had a club soda.)

The shooter in CT was known to download music and movies. If only we had been able to track his movie choices properly, and note a slide towards more violent movies and video games, then we could have prevented the tragedy of 20 kindergarten children.

It's a fairly small price to pay, having each person's movie preferences checked and analysed a licensed psychologist. Mandating that devices can only play movies that have been approved by the MIAA, and music approved by the RIAA, ensures that our children will be safe at school. /The outside of my molars in delicious, by the way.

Well Mr. Godwin, you could also say that games like GTA IV, HALO, Gears of War, etc show us the difference that one person can make.

Dude, everyone at the NYT went home for Christmas. All they have left in the building is two interns and a janitor.

But they'll give a wicked gum job. ;)

Why not two seventy-year-old women?

They'll both assume you're with the other one and he can get to the lab to get some work done.

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FTFY