...or at least one of them.

Highlights include the fact that Jack Lord could smell into the future, that Poutine is grown from seeds, that you can kill French people by carefully mispronouncing the French language in their presence, and that Lee Majors can travel through time.

Clearly I'm batshit insane, so thank God for bills like the one proposed, since I cause so much anguish to so many. I really need to be stopped.

They did the sensible thing and took my order across the street to McDonald's, returning to me (at a marginal reseller's markup) a quality steak from a trusted manufacturer.

The truly sad part is that I'd probably eat a McDonald's steak. Mmm. Charred cow flesh.

But I'd never admit to it. Oh, wait. Crap.

I'm man enough to admit that I have pirated music which I would have paid for otherwise.

I guess I'm not. I will NOT buy CDs or anything on iTunes, but as soon as Amazon started selling MP3s that:

• Will play on pretty much anything.
• Are unrestricted, and
• Don't absolutely require the use of a funky downloader to get

I started purchasing every song in my download folder and that was available through them (I tend to keep my collection pretty clean and delete anything I don't like after a play or two). Yes, that meant a few hundred dollars over the last several months. Yes, that also means there are some songs in there that still aren't legit (they're not available through Amazon).

Amazon, in short, has what I want the way I want it, and I'm quite willing to pay for that. I suspect that, once this silly DRM thing goes away, people will be plenty honest enough to keep the music business from dying. The days of obscene margins on an artificially-scarce product are over, but the death of the industry is not at hand.

IF the labels keep a cool head about it and don't do anything (else) stupid.

Do what they did to muscle cars in the 50s and 60s--add fins to the back, a blower to the front, and retrofit a big speaker (for the obligatory loud revving noises when you turn it on).

Then again, if you add a "blower" to the front, who cares if it's "cute?"

Am I the only one who saw the words "EPIC Complaint" and got the image in my head about a guy driving a car into the complaints department at some auto manufacturer?

That would be an epic complaint.