He'd only read a little more of the report when he laid the tablet down and grabbed the fone and called his secretary. "Book a flight to Mars as soon as you can get me there," he said.
He composed a letter to his daughter. "Dear Destiny," it said, "I wish you'd stay in touch. I'm in the middle of reading your fiancee's report and I see you're getting married. Please wait until I get there, I want to give my daughter away
After he sent the mail a message from the company president came in.
"Dewey, I just now fired that idiot Richardson. That moron must have had a devout Jewish Rabbi to program the robots to cook pork, because I just had barbecued pork steaks on this ship and they were worse than the coffee.
"The ship's captain is excellent, from what I can tell as a random traveler. You know I went under an assumed name. Well, no sooner had the robot brought me coffee when the captain himself brought a pot of excellent coffee in and apologized for the robot coffee. He said he made coffee for all his passengers, even when he was flying cargo class passengers. At least some of our people are doing a good job, even above and beyond. Captain Muñoz said that all the first class captains were doing it, and even most cargo captains, and that there was one guy named 'Tex' that made barbecued pork for his passengers. Steaks, ribs, chops, Muñoz said that Texas is famous for barbecue. I understand that the Australians are pretty crazy about barbecue, too.
"Anyway, I wish you'd talk to Engineering and promote someone as chief. See you when I get back to Earth."
He composed a memo to all engineering staff.
FROM: Dewey Green, CEO
SUBJECT: New Chief
Staff, your chief has tendered his resignation immediately and I am looking for his replacement. I want my engineers to be productive, and you're more productive when you enjoy your assignments. I want my engineers to be happy.
Please reply with answers to the following questions, and let none of the answers be your own name.
1. Who do you consider to be our best engineer, and why?
2. Who would you most want to be chief engineer, and why?
3. Who would you consider to be our worst engineer, and why?
4, Who would you want least to be our chief engineer, and why?
5. Which or our engineers has the best people skills?
I expect a reply in one hour and will expect all of you to be in conference room three in two hours.
He poured a cup of coffee and continued reading.