stinky wizzleteats's Journal: My sig database

Encouraged by my recent ranking among the worst sigs on slashdot, I've decided to become more prolific with my writing of sigs. Here is where I will keep them, as I think of them much more frequently than I update my sig. Here's the one that started it all; my personal crowning glory.

• If you broke the corner off of a piece of toast, and tried to stab food with it, it would not become a spoast.

I liked this sig. It kicked off many a discussion, my most favorite of which started with "You are absolutely correct. It would be a toark." Sadly, this sig is not original on my part. It's part of a long rant about the great spork conspiracy to delude us into believing that defective spoons were actually a utensil. I thought it was intensely funny, and crammed as much of the core points into my sig as possible.

• There are only so many witty sayings in the universe. This one is taken.

Of course, I encourage everyone to use this sig. There is never enough self referencing irony in Slashdot sigs these days, and all of us could certainly stand to see more.

• ... to crush your enemies, see them driven before you, and to hear the lamentations of their women.

Certainly not original, but you can never go wrong with a Conan quote. Especially with one as unrepentantly male as this one. I suddenly have the urge to go into the woods and beat on drums.

• sparse(adj)-

In the spirit of the joke, I'll refrain from explaining it.