Journal Nymz's Journal: Lost Fans - A Tribute to Mikhail 7
Mikhail is the man.
Mikhail is always prepared. Who else would think to bring a hand grenade to an underwater radio jamming station? In fact he travels with a dozen grenades, two assault rifles, a knife, an emergency medical kit, and a set of scuba gear down his pants.
Mikhail is an excellent fighter. Back when the purge was going on, Mikhail roundhouse kicked some guy so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, traveled through an infinite number of parallel universes, and knocked the poor bastard into an alternate dimension where no one could see him. His name was Jacob.
The others live in a little gated suburb, and hide from Smokey behind a sonic fence. Not Mikhail, he has his own pad, with beers in the fridge, and an entertainment center that gets all the pr0n channels. When anyone comes near, he shoots at them, including that wus Ben. The 2 tons of explosives rigged throughout the place don't bother Mikhail at all, he didn't call it the Flame for nothing, this is a man's station, not one of those girly sounding stations like the Swan, the Pearl, or the Looking Glass. No, Mikhails place is a mans place and he doesn't clean it, when it gets dirty he just blows it up and builds a new one.
The others built the polar bear cages, not for their own protection, but to save the polar bears from Mikhail. He luvs a good beach barbecue.
Lock did throw Mikhail into the sonic fence once, but Mikhail let him. There's no Russian vodka on the island so Mikhail drinks that crappy Dharma beer that leaves you with one hell of a hangover, and a little jolt from the sonic fence clears Mikhail right up. He even said "thank you" afterward, what a gentleman.
Mikhail sleeps with a Dharma nite-light on. Not because he's afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of him.
Mikhail is a master of all weapons, and an excellect shot. Do you remember when he was shooting at Desmond out on the boat. He missed you say? Look again and you'll notice Mikhail is firing right handed, looking through the sight with his patched right eye. No, it wasn't a blooper, using his other eye just wouldn't be sporting. Might as well use a bazooka to shoot a squirrel.
Mikhail wasn't born, he was grown in a Russian super-lab, with DNA from a 9-lives cat, Chuck Norris, and a tank.
For anyone that thinks Mikhail died in the season finale, think again, how could Desmond possibly get a spear-gun made from real kyptonite. The Island won't let Mikhail die anyway, it has to prevent the universe's coolness quotient from plummeting to critical levels and getting the show canceled.
Mikhail is always prepared. Who else would think to bring a hand grenade to an underwater radio jamming station? In fact he travels with a dozen grenades, two assault rifles, a knife, an emergency medical kit, and a set of scuba gear down his pants.
Mikhail is an excellent fighter. Back when the purge was going on, Mikhail roundhouse kicked some guy so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, traveled through an infinite number of parallel universes, and knocked the poor bastard into an alternate dimension where no one could see him. His name was Jacob.
The others live in a little gated suburb, and hide from Smokey behind a sonic fence. Not Mikhail, he has his own pad, with beers in the fridge, and an entertainment center that gets all the pr0n channels. When anyone comes near, he shoots at them, including that wus Ben. The 2 tons of explosives rigged throughout the place don't bother Mikhail at all, he didn't call it the Flame for nothing, this is a man's station, not one of those girly sounding stations like the Swan, the Pearl, or the Looking Glass. No, Mikhails place is a mans place and he doesn't clean it, when it gets dirty he just blows it up and builds a new one.
The others built the polar bear cages, not for their own protection, but to save the polar bears from Mikhail. He luvs a good beach barbecue.
Lock did throw Mikhail into the sonic fence once, but Mikhail let him. There's no Russian vodka on the island so Mikhail drinks that crappy Dharma beer that leaves you with one hell of a hangover, and a little jolt from the sonic fence clears Mikhail right up. He even said "thank you" afterward, what a gentleman.
Mikhail sleeps with a Dharma nite-light on. Not because he's afraid of the dark, but because the dark is afraid of him.
Mikhail is a master of all weapons, and an excellect shot. Do you remember when he was shooting at Desmond out on the boat. He missed you say? Look again and you'll notice Mikhail is firing right handed, looking through the sight with his patched right eye. No, it wasn't a blooper, using his other eye just wouldn't be sporting. Might as well use a bazooka to shoot a squirrel.
Mikhail wasn't born, he was grown in a Russian super-lab, with DNA from a 9-lives cat, Chuck Norris, and a tank.
For anyone that thinks Mikhail died in the season finale, think again, how could Desmond possibly get a spear-gun made from real kyptonite. The Island won't let Mikhail die anyway, it has to prevent the universe's coolness quotient from plummeting to critical levels and getting the show canceled.
ROFL (Score:2)
Locke is another favorite (Score:2)
Yeh... (Score:2)
HaHa, I can imagine (Score:2)
Mikhail says "2 out of 3"
Hurley beats Mikhail at ping-pong, again
Mikhail asks "how about a game of chess" (Locke blew up his chess computer)
Hurley says "I don't think so dude"
Mikhail pulls out his rifle
Hurley runs him over with the bus...GAME!
Re: (Score:1)
Excellent (Score:2)
Indeed, this is a fitting tribute to an astouningly manly man.
Awesomeness (Score:2)