So I'm being sued by someone, but I don't know over "what". And their lawyer's caller ID lies. This is not a good day. Remind me never to work on a holiday.
1999 was looking to be even better: with the end of school, I now have student loan payments, crap from E*Trade, more insurance, Older family members wills, jobs with benefits, a few credit cards... and suddenly its august and the '1999' folder is twice as big as 1998 was at the end of its lifespan.
What this means is of course the dreaded "F" word: Filing. I've divided up my gigantic folder "1999" into a dozen nicely labeled folders with titles like "Checking Account" and "Credit Cards" and "Inusurance". For those who know me, this isn't that surprising: I'm fairly anal, but I think that my rats nest of personal documents was kinda my hold-out against the grown-up world.
I'm 23 now, and now my documents are pretty well organized. In fact, I'm considering moving them into a safe: Hemos's house burned down once: I know what a hassle losing all your shit can be. But the now I have this box that pretty much contains the paper trail of my existance in a dozen green hanging file folders.
When I walk out of my front door to go to the office, they are there yelling "Bang Bang Bang" and pointing invisible guns at me. We rushed them once, and now they've taken to playing ding-dong-digit every 5 minutes, and pressing their faces against the window on the front door every 10 minutes. Its a little bit disturbing. I think they're just jealous because we have more legos then they do.
The next step is of course computer access. Maybe a gnome panel applet. Or a CGI application (Control-Taco's-Lava-Lamps.com?). It's really all down hill from here. I mean, they sell security cameras. My receiver has a spare RCA video input just waiting. Soon I'll never need to leave my couch- I'll just sit in all my paranoid splendor in complete control of my environment eating corn chips [?] , drinking beer [?] and hacking perl [?] . Probably ought to wait until I get better bandwidth than 56k before I go ahead and donate my legs to science.
So I swap batteries with nates laptop (haha! The sucker is still on his June Term in India!) and things work. But its not for another hour that I realize that the reason is that I sat my recliner down and sliced through my power cable. I got scared and dropped it as sparks hot out of the exposed metal. Apparently it was shorting out through the support structure of our sofa. Kinda creapy.
Anyway its always the physical that gets me down. Grr. Good thing Nate doesn't get back for a few days...
Now the problem is that they divide the films. Half of the movies go to each theater and this is all apparently pre-arranged. While The Star did get Star Wars, the 7 got Austin Powers and is scheduled to get South Park. If there was an option, I would always select the better theater. I mean, its even closer.
So when good movies go to the Holland 7, I have to drive 45 miles just to see them in a good theater. I hate holland sometimes.
Anyway, I recently shaved my goat, and for the first time in 9 months, I wasn't searched on my way home. So my options are:
- Have a cheesy goattee, look like a dork, and get searched in airports.
- Remain clean shaved, nick myself regularly while shaving, look like I'm 13, a dork, and be left alone.
The worst part is that at 23 I am carded every time I order a drink, but the goattee saved me from that. I may look like an axe murderer, but at least I look like a post pubescant axe murderer. What a world.
So now I'm cold. Its been there for like 9 months. I didn't realize it was keeping me warm. Apparently the little bit of chin fluff served a purpose. Now my chin feels wet all the time. Wierd. Maybe next I'll try to grow mutton chops. Sure, I'll hit my midlife crisis before I look anything like elvis, but it would be fun.
- Victoria's Secret 1999 Swimsuit Edition (sent to one Jeffrey C Bates)
- Sid Meier's Alpha Centauri Manual
- Derek and the Dominos, Layla and Other Assorted Love Songs (guitar tabs)
- Victoria's Secret Spring Fashion Issue (sent to one Rob W Malda)
- Linux Magazine, the Spring issue. I have read about 3 paragraphs out of this thing, but its there.
- The Perl Journal (Issue #10- Summer of 98)
- Wired (March 99- the issue with hemos & I in it, and the only issue of Wired I own. I haven't read it)
- The Perl Journal (Issue #11- Winter of 98) Everyone should subscribe to this thing.
Ugh. Seriously I've been chewing my nails down to the flesh for as long as I can remember. Its not healthy, in fact its quite gross. And sometimes I bite just a little to far, and then I have a finger that hurts and it impedes my typing.
This is compounded by my obsessive guitar playing. For an hour or so each day I try to play my beloved Gibson SG. But if I chewed a nail short, that doesn't happen, and my only stress outlet is to yell at Hemos or Nate. That doesn't make anyone happy. Plus I'd really like to be able to pick with my finger nails. That would be so cool.
So I'm resolving to quit. For the last week I've done a good job. Except today when the server was flaking I got really stressed out and totally chewed the middle nail on my right hand down to the flesh. Ouch.
So Now I'm filing my nails. My Leatherman Wave has this handy little filer, so I sit and I file my nails down. I'm pretty sure this doesn't matter because whether I use my teeth or a file, I still don't have any nails, but somehow my brain tells me this will break me of this evil habit. We'll see.
But then you apt-get upgrade to catch up on the latest bits and pieces in potato... and you decide to play tetris... and then you discover that the down arrow behaves properly! Like, it doesn't just slide the piece down to the bottom, instead it drops at an accelerated rate until you let go of the key. Just like the original.
Then you piss your pants and think 'maybe it ain't so bad after all'. It really is the little things ain't it?
I wish I had no morals. I'm rarely the sort of person that would considere revenge- I get angry and stomp and yell, but for once I think I'd be justified to do more than throw a tantrum. To bad I'm a wuss. I just burn off steam writing here instead of posting it somewhere less appropriate and really hurting them. God damn morals.