The NTSB isn't targeting eating, or car stereos (with fancy graphic equalizers that allow you to remix the songs while you are driving), or talkative passengers, so I can come to only one conclusion: Allowing the driver to talk is apparently what makes cell phones so dangerous.

It is reasonable then to suggest that, rather than banning cell phones, we should require ball-gags as standard equipment in a motor vehicles. Police should the enforce the use of these new devices, and issue tickets to drivers that fail to use them.

What if we find out all they ever say is "Swim swim hungry, swim swim hungry"?

Ha ha ha ha! No, stop please. You're killing me.

That eldavojohn, he's such a card.

In my youth, I discovered that an acetylene torch and a couple of balloons could provide about as big a boom as you'd probably need. I'd fill a balloon with 1/2 acetylene and 1/2 O2, then put some kind of fuse on the balloon, light it, and run.

"We're the phone company. We don't care - we don't have to."

So the entire video was 45 seconds long, of which about 10-15 seconds seemed to be the actual earthquake. Isn't "the Big One" (in my state of California) supposed to be somewhere about 5-7 minutes?

Also, did their model include refrigerators, washers, dryers, dishwashers, and all the other stuff that would be loaded into such a building? Or did they build an empty box and call it a "condo".

This is great, but mark my words, when we run out of oxygen we'll have to begin the hunt for yet another power source all over again.

Wait, Mark Twain (Samuel Clemens) was born in Missouri.