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First Person Shooters (Games)

Journal Some Woman's Journal: Ramble Without Perspective, Part 1 23

Journal by Some Woman

This will be done in two parts because it is, well...rather lengthy.

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Executive Summary: This is a tale of petty melodrama, of a girl living in my house who earnestly believes that I have a personal vendetta against her and that my single goal in life is to make her miserable through window opening. I wouldn't hesitate to call her delusional.

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Dramatis Personae:

Some Woman I believe you are familiar with this one
Wit Future pharmacist and House Director for this fine establishment
Shorty A mechanical engineering graduate friend who lives in the house
Spex Materials Scientist friend and resident.
The Crazy Our resident delusional and star of this play

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Background: The Crazy is a boarder in our un-air-conditioned house who believes that the best way to keep it cool during the summer is to keep all of the windows closed at all times. There are a few faulty assumptions here, the main one being that there is no "cool" to keep. So, everyday she closes the windows whenever she finds them to be open.[1] And I, or one of my fellow thermodynamically-aware friends (there are at least 4 or 5 people on this task force), will open them up again.

[1] Unless there is somebody in the room.[2] She won't close them if there's somebody watching; she's passive aggressive like that. :^)

[2] Not too hard to find an empty room, as the rest of us have jobs, because we can't afford to stay at home in bed masturbating all day.[3]

[3] No, I'm not kidding. At first people thought I was crazy because I was the only person who had heard the noises coming from the bedroom on the other side of the bathroom wall (her room). As of today, there are at least 4 others who can corroborate the tale. when my boyfriend heard it, he started laughing so loud that she stopped. Poor girl, did 't even get to finish. :^) The only question remaining is why the hell is she so loud when she's alone?! We have come up with a few possibilities, including: She's actually having phone sex, she's starring in web cam porn, or that she is trying to convince herself that she's any good. I favor the last one.

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ACT THE FIRST

It was a warm summer day, the 20th of July, 2004. SW arrives home from work and notice that the windows are closed and that The Crazy has her door open.[1]

SW: *opens windows*
The Crazy: *Immediately comes out of room, yelling* What are you doing?!
SW: Opening the windows to let the cool breeze in.
The Crazy: Oh, it's cool, is it?!
SW: Yes.
The Crazy: For your information, the house is much cooler now than it was at 10 AM because the windows are CLOSED!
SW: Look, all of the people in this house who have taken thermodynamics agree that convective cooling is your friend.
The Crazy: You are sooo dumb I can't even believe it! *stomps off to room and slams door*

Not 30 minutes later, Shorty and SW are standing in the living room about to leave for an apartment viewing.

The Crazy: *stomping out of room angrily* So, tell me again about your "thermodynamics."[2]
SW: Well, you see, the air comes in through the windows, and we have this fan set up at such an angle that it maximizes air flow throu-
The Crazy: *some sort of angered grunt/eye rolling*
SW: *walks to kitchen, to Shorty* She must have really high blood pressure.
The Crazy: *stomps into kitchen, hands on hips* If you have something to say about me, say it to my face.
SW: Well, I was just commenting to Shorty here that you must have really high blood pressure and that's why you have to eat all of that crazy healthy food.[3]
The Crazy: No, my blood pressure is actually fine, because I take care of my body instead of sitting on the couch and eating junk food all day. *Exit The Crazy*
SW: Hm.
Shorty: You know, it's actually been a long time since we've sat on the couch and ate junk food.
SW: Yeah. Since school got out or something. It's been more than a month.
Shorty: We should really get on that.
SW: What are you doing this weekend?

[1] Very odd because she doesn't speak to anybody else, and also because has an air conditioner in her room.
[2] Yes, the quotes were palpable.
[3] Only time I've ever said something irrelevant to provoke her. Honest. :^)

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Ramble Without Perspective, Part 1 More

Ramble Without Perspective, Part 1

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  • Crazy (Score:1)

    by Sloppy ( 14984 ) *
    If people laughed at me when I masterbated, I would go crazy too. Getting laughed at during real sex is bad enough.
    • True... What she needs is discretion training. I am pretty sure every guy growing up that figured out how "that thing" works, at some point figured out that it would be bad to do this when others are around, or know about it.

      Heh. Probably really embarassing for her too.

      Oh well. I guess she shouldn't have been doing it if she didn't want to deal with the consequences of being discovered.

      jason
  • Now that I'm perma-shacked up, I miss all the drama that used to swirl around me.

    Like that time I dated that girl who lived with my friends when they were ripping off all the people that sub-rented from them to the point where they didn't pay any rent. That was really cool.

    And that time when I helped the aformentioned friends move and totally missed a very very BAD semi-orgy in my apartment (trust me... so glad I wasn't around... the fallout after that one was tremendous)

    And friends would move in over
  • So, tell me again about your "thermodynamics."

    You're now the inventor of thermodynamics? Such an honor to meet you...

    Sounds like a bit of a drama queen too.

    ^_^

  • Maybe in all this heat she's... dehydrated... and is having a difficult time achieving... relief. Perhaps you should give her a self-love care package, and include some lube, some batteries, and maybe some good porn...

    Heck! Send me one of those while you're at it! ;-)

    ....Bethanie....

  • 1. Sneak into her room and check her cam address for me ;)

    2. "Lisa, in this house, we OBEY the laws of thermodynamics!" -Homer

    3. Keeping he windows closed CAN work if:

    1. A. You open them at Sundown
    1. B. You close them at Sunrise
    1. C. You keep the doors closed (As much as possible)
    1. D. You keep the blinds drawn (or have trees, buildings, etc.. casting shade on your windows)
    1. E. Your house is well insulated.

    4. No, really. I'm serious about her iFriends address. ;)

    5. Vanilla cream filled cookies dipped in mi

    • She would close the windows every time they were open regardless of outside temperature, closed blinds, and time of day, though I believe that the state of the actual window matters more because convection is more powerful than conduction or radiation as a means of heat transfer (at least in this case). The house is also poorly insulated (very old) and the doors are opened quite a bit as 13 people come and go.

      Milk sounds too healthy. Perhaps a vanilla shake with an extra helping of lard? :^)
      • It might also depend on the temperature outside.
        I'm guessing you live in an area with higher humidity, but in areas that get Santa-Anna weather (Over 100 Degrees F with high winds) the winds actually make the heat feel hotter, at least from my perspective. Kinda like a wind-chill but with heat.

        Then again, I haven't studied this "Thermodynamics" that you speak of.
        Can you confirm my emotional assessment of this theoretical situation?

        But then if you don't have good insulation, I guess there isn't much you ca
    • I'm distinctly not a thermal engineer, but I know in my house that shutting the windows increases the temperature. I live in north county San Diego, about 7 miles inland from the ocean. Everyday is about 78 degrees with a 5-10 mph eastward wind. If I close the sliders to the back of the house, which is mostly facing north-east, the house will be hot and stuffy at 5 pm (when I get home). Leave them open, and it'll actually cooler in the house than the temperature gauge on the back of the house (which is
  • I could really use that kiddie pool and margarita thing tonight! But it's ok... I have vanilla rum and I procured some Diet Dr. Peppers... Hope your crazy gets uncrazied or moves out. wHichever! :-)
    • Nope, she's there for another year. But I am moving out on August 31. Unfortunately, that means that Wit is stuck with her. :^(

      By the way, I'm impressed that you could spell "procured" after your procurence. :^)
  • She's working through some issues from her childhood. That definitely sounds like parroting of bullshit her parents told her growing up--hell, for all we know, where she lived, it might even be true that you need to keep the windows closed.
    • It is true in this place. The house is so well insulated, that on certain days, it takes a while for the inside temperature to catch up to the outside. Once the outside becomes cooler than the inside, we literally start fanning the hot air to the outside. We've managed to boil it all down to a science.

      Some Woman, doesn't the air conditioner manage to cool the entire apartment? I ask because the windows are supposed to stay closed when the air conditioner runs. Maybe the air conditioner isn't powerful enoug
      • This is a 3-floor (+ basement) house with 12 bedrooms that is old and poorly insulated. The window air conditioners that people can sometimes run (when the circuits will bear it) are really only good for cooling an individual bedroom, which is why your bedroom door should be shut when it runs to maximize the effect on your own room. When people leave their doors open, there is little to no effect on the temperature of the common space because of the hugeness of it all.

        • When people leave their doors open, there is little to no effect on the temperature of the common space because of the hugeness of it all.

          Are you telling me that she actually opens the windows of all 12 rooms?? On all 3 floors? Somehow I wouldn't be surprised, but if so, you could take comfort in the fact that most people aren't like that, but the few that are like that tend to grow out of it. :^/ :^) I really want to know, does she do this just for her floor or for all 12 rooms?

          • She does this to all of the openable common-area windows (which are all located on the first floor). She does not have access (well, legally, at least) to the other bedrooms.

            To clarify the sentence you quoted, I was trying to say that leaving her door open with the air conditioner on is silly because it only causes her room to be warmer and would have little effect in cooling the common areas.

            • To clarify the sentence you quoted

              Yeah, I knew what you meant. For some reason people don't understand how the air conditioner works. They turn it on full blast, & leave doors & windows open, wondering why it's still hot. There's just too much air to condition & the heat "seaps" in through a lot of wall area. Also, from your description of the girl, I was under the impression that she would be willing to go into people's rooms when they weren't looking.

              Thanks for the answer.

              Just in case we're

  • I guess I can put this one down in the column marked "wasted effort or mischief caused by a lack of knowledge of the applicable science."

    That column is getting mighty full these days.

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