I had to google what keelhauled meant.
That's extremely hard. Good luck getting something like that to actually work. The senior electronics engineer who might be able to create such grabbing system has probably a better-paying job somewhere else.
If you could manufacture a device that would bypass virtually all forms of video/audio DRM, you could make some nice pocket change I'm sure. Or at the very least you could impress at a convention.
They should at least make retail games count, just exclude keys from Humble Bundles. I mean, even if they hunted bargain bins for old keys it would still create a lot of labor per account.