m0smithslash's Journal: Encourage, not discourage

When we try to encourage someone to correct some behavior, it is often easy to discourage them instead. They need to hear twice as much good about themselves as they hear bad.

I agree

[bubblegoose]

That is one thing I constantly am trying to remind myself when dealing with my 3 year old daughter.

Re:I agree

[m0smithslash]

In Toastmaster we are taught to dish out 2 compliments for each "correction" in evaluating. I think this would work for kids as well. Couch the correction in a between shows of love, confidence and affection.

Re:

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Re:And sometimes

[m0smithslash]

You can't change other people, you can only change your own behavior in a way that elicts the desired change in someone else. As you are doing this, it is important to let them know you really care about them and not the behavior only.

Of course, they have to do their own changing and they may not be willing.

I don't understand what you mean by "discouragement is not an option". It seems to be the natural reaction displeasing someone whose opinion matters to you.

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