Journal bethanie's Journal: [Working Out] Background/Progress Report -- One Year 25
A year ago 1 October I joined one of my local gyms (the closest one to me that provides childcare) and started exercising on a regular basis.
Well, actually, I went and joined, then I went over to the sporting goods store and bought myself a pair of sneakers (I did not have *any* -- how's THAT for a lifestyle indicator?!) and THEN I started working out regularly.
I started out kinda slow, in relatively familiar territory -- first on the one ancient Stairmaster that they had (the kind I'd used when I desperately lost 25+ pounds before I got married) for, oh, maybe 15 minutes at a time. I slowly ramped up to more time, and then tried out the elliptical trainer that just has stationary bars that you hold onto. Found that it was really nice, so I spent a good month or so playing around on it, increasing my time to 30 minutes and even getting into increasing the resistance.
And then a couple of times both of those stationary-armed elliptical machines were occupied when I wanted to work on them, and because I was (and am) hardcore, I refused to slack off and do the treadmill copout. Instead, I moved up another notch to the arms AND legs elliptical machine. And I stayed at 30 minutes. But I avoided the resistance. I found that that was a *really* intense workout -- challenging... but fun, too, when I had a great playlist to accompany it.
Now, at the same time that I started doing cardio, I also started doing weight training using a few machines (upper body -- lats, delts, & pecs, with some back & triceps work) and free weights (working arms, shoulders & chest).
Oh -- and of course, there's the stretching time on the floor in between cardio & weights, and that's when I work on my flexibility and do all those great ab exercises and butt & thigh toning stuff like lunges & dirty dogs & donkey kicks -- and push-ups. Gotta love push-ups.
Back in January, or maybe it was February, after I got back from Cali when my dad died, they started having weekly yoga classes. I took a yoga for the first time back in 1992 when I was a sophomore in college. I thought it would make me more flexible for sex. HA! It was just really really hard to do; I should have known better than to take a yoga class at Smith -- everything they do there is going to kick your ass.
Fortunately, I didn't let my "Ow this hurts so bad I think I'm dying" experience in yoga the first time around spoil it for me. The next time I had the opportunity to do so (it was 1998) I started taking classes again. And this time, I had a great instructor and it was about the journey and where each individual was -- it wasn't about competing or making things hurt as much as possible. Sure, you push yourself in each pose -- but it's only to the point of gentle pressure; every pose is for relaxing in.
From that class, I took lots of different elements and incorporated them into the way I move or stand or sit or occasionally stretch. I still do a lot of yoga-ish stretching as part of my daily routine, and now I'm wanting to start doing "real" yoga every day on my own; I think I'm ready for that -- it's just a matter of making it a habit and setting aside the time.
Over the year-long period since I started exercising, I have gone from around 180 pounds down to around 164 (but weight always fluctuates). I was wearing size 18 jeans very snugly back then... and now I can pull size 14s off the rack (and NOT the fat chick one!) at any store and at least be able to get them on; whether or not I like the way they look is a different matter -- but even being able to evaulate clothing based on whether or not I like the way it *looks* on me is a refreshing novelty again. I used to just have to settle for whatever I could find that would fit.
Being fat also meant that ANY physical activity was going to mean PAIN. Like mowing the lawn -- I would have pushed the mower around my little yard, and then been feeling it in my hams and my arms and my back (particularly my back!!) for a week afterwards. When I was heavier, I was in constant pain. I don't know when it went away -- or maybe it hasn't, because even now I'm pretty darn sore. But my soreness now is more along the lines of being aware of where I've worked really hard -- and it feels good.
I have finally learned not to pay attention to the number on the scale, but rather to pay attention to how I *feel* and how my clothes fit. How I look to myself is unreliable, because I haven't quite learned yet how to see myself beyond the flaws that always jump out and grab all my attention. Sometimes I have moments of clarity... but mostly I have to use other criteria by which to evaluate my "progress."
One major development for me is that in the last couple of weeks, I've done some running.
There's a 5K Fun Run coming up in my town, and after years of driving by and scoffing at how nuts people must be to punish themselves thusly, I found myself this year thinking, "Hey -- I bet I could *do* that!"
So I got on the treadmill and gave it a try, just to see if I'd be able to manage to finish the "race" within the allotted 40 minutes. It turned out that I did a little over 5K in less than 28 minutes -- AND I actually *ran* for more than 6 minutes straight on my first attempt!!
I also got really bad shin splints (always happens when I try running), but on my next attempt, I ran for FIFTEEN MINUTES without stopping to walk. That covered a distance of more than one entire mile. I had NEVER run an entire mile in my ENTIRE life -- not when I was in high school, not when I was in college -- NEVER. I know it's not a real fast pace to have set; I am the first to acknowledge that I'm built for comfort and not for speed. Just being able to go an entire mile blows me away.
So I guess it was Talinom that wanted to hear our diet/weight loss stories. The truth of mine is that no dieting has been involved. I have continued to eat what I like, when I want it. There have been times when I've cut back on my latte consumption, or have focused on eating more fish and fruits & veggies -- but honestly, I haven't tried to restrict or modify my diet in an effort to lose weight.
And I haven't even been trying to lose weight, per se. I am fully aware that muscle is a lot more dense than fat, so as I gain muscle, I might see the numbers go wonky and slip in the "wrong" direction a little. I just don't freak out. I don't get real excited when I'm down a pound or two -- and I don't get the least bit fazed when it goes up. I can gain or lose that amount of weight overnight, depending on how hard I've worked out and how much water I've had to drink.
Oh, I think I should also mention that my BMI is 31. That's officially obese, by the way. So please, look at my pictures and see what obesity looks like. (Either that, or acknowledge that maybe BMI is *not* the end-all/be-all of healthy weight gauges.) I think that based on normal charts, since I'm 5'1" I should weigh ideally around 115 pounds. And that just ain't never gonna happen. I've got too much muscle and my tits are just way too big. So hell with the charts -- I'm voluptuous and gonna stay that way. I don't think I'm perfect right where I am -- but I'm not really concerned about "losing more weight" either.
Things that I've really noticed about the changes in my body are, well, yeah, I'm less fat. It really shows in my face, I think. My RoF is reducing in size -- but I've had two kids, and I *never* had a flat stomach even before they were born; I'm not holding out much hope that I'll be able to develop one now. What I find myself particularly excited about is the definition I can see in my arms. Even though my body fat is still pretty high (I don't know what it is, but all you have to do is look at me to know it's true), my arms are well-toned and change shape as I move & engage in different activities.
I also really like how flexible I am now. I can touch my forehead to all different kinds of parts of my body; I can bend and straighten my legs all over the place; I can lean forward & backwards & sideways really far -- while standing flat-footed...
I'm pleased with my body. I enjoy the clothes I can wear. I feel strong and healthy and energetic. I don't need any numbers to tell me any of this. I am living the truth. :-)
Well, actually, I went and joined, then I went over to the sporting goods store and bought myself a pair of sneakers (I did not have *any* -- how's THAT for a lifestyle indicator?!) and THEN I started working out regularly.
I started out kinda slow, in relatively familiar territory -- first on the one ancient Stairmaster that they had (the kind I'd used when I desperately lost 25+ pounds before I got married) for, oh, maybe 15 minutes at a time. I slowly ramped up to more time, and then tried out the elliptical trainer that just has stationary bars that you hold onto. Found that it was really nice, so I spent a good month or so playing around on it, increasing my time to 30 minutes and even getting into increasing the resistance.
And then a couple of times both of those stationary-armed elliptical machines were occupied when I wanted to work on them, and because I was (and am) hardcore, I refused to slack off and do the treadmill copout. Instead, I moved up another notch to the arms AND legs elliptical machine. And I stayed at 30 minutes. But I avoided the resistance. I found that that was a *really* intense workout -- challenging... but fun, too, when I had a great playlist to accompany it.
Now, at the same time that I started doing cardio, I also started doing weight training using a few machines (upper body -- lats, delts, & pecs, with some back & triceps work) and free weights (working arms, shoulders & chest).
Oh -- and of course, there's the stretching time on the floor in between cardio & weights, and that's when I work on my flexibility and do all those great ab exercises and butt & thigh toning stuff like lunges & dirty dogs & donkey kicks -- and push-ups. Gotta love push-ups.
Back in January, or maybe it was February, after I got back from Cali when my dad died, they started having weekly yoga classes. I took a yoga for the first time back in 1992 when I was a sophomore in college. I thought it would make me more flexible for sex. HA! It was just really really hard to do; I should have known better than to take a yoga class at Smith -- everything they do there is going to kick your ass.
Fortunately, I didn't let my "Ow this hurts so bad I think I'm dying" experience in yoga the first time around spoil it for me. The next time I had the opportunity to do so (it was 1998) I started taking classes again. And this time, I had a great instructor and it was about the journey and where each individual was -- it wasn't about competing or making things hurt as much as possible. Sure, you push yourself in each pose -- but it's only to the point of gentle pressure; every pose is for relaxing in.
From that class, I took lots of different elements and incorporated them into the way I move or stand or sit or occasionally stretch. I still do a lot of yoga-ish stretching as part of my daily routine, and now I'm wanting to start doing "real" yoga every day on my own; I think I'm ready for that -- it's just a matter of making it a habit and setting aside the time.
Over the year-long period since I started exercising, I have gone from around 180 pounds down to around 164 (but weight always fluctuates). I was wearing size 18 jeans very snugly back then... and now I can pull size 14s off the rack (and NOT the fat chick one!) at any store and at least be able to get them on; whether or not I like the way they look is a different matter -- but even being able to evaulate clothing based on whether or not I like the way it *looks* on me is a refreshing novelty again. I used to just have to settle for whatever I could find that would fit.
Being fat also meant that ANY physical activity was going to mean PAIN. Like mowing the lawn -- I would have pushed the mower around my little yard, and then been feeling it in my hams and my arms and my back (particularly my back!!) for a week afterwards. When I was heavier, I was in constant pain. I don't know when it went away -- or maybe it hasn't, because even now I'm pretty darn sore. But my soreness now is more along the lines of being aware of where I've worked really hard -- and it feels good.
I have finally learned not to pay attention to the number on the scale, but rather to pay attention to how I *feel* and how my clothes fit. How I look to myself is unreliable, because I haven't quite learned yet how to see myself beyond the flaws that always jump out and grab all my attention. Sometimes I have moments of clarity... but mostly I have to use other criteria by which to evaluate my "progress."
One major development for me is that in the last couple of weeks, I've done some running.
There's a 5K Fun Run coming up in my town, and after years of driving by and scoffing at how nuts people must be to punish themselves thusly, I found myself this year thinking, "Hey -- I bet I could *do* that!"
So I got on the treadmill and gave it a try, just to see if I'd be able to manage to finish the "race" within the allotted 40 minutes. It turned out that I did a little over 5K in less than 28 minutes -- AND I actually *ran* for more than 6 minutes straight on my first attempt!!
I also got really bad shin splints (always happens when I try running), but on my next attempt, I ran for FIFTEEN MINUTES without stopping to walk. That covered a distance of more than one entire mile. I had NEVER run an entire mile in my ENTIRE life -- not when I was in high school, not when I was in college -- NEVER. I know it's not a real fast pace to have set; I am the first to acknowledge that I'm built for comfort and not for speed. Just being able to go an entire mile blows me away.
So I guess it was Talinom that wanted to hear our diet/weight loss stories. The truth of mine is that no dieting has been involved. I have continued to eat what I like, when I want it. There have been times when I've cut back on my latte consumption, or have focused on eating more fish and fruits & veggies -- but honestly, I haven't tried to restrict or modify my diet in an effort to lose weight.
And I haven't even been trying to lose weight, per se. I am fully aware that muscle is a lot more dense than fat, so as I gain muscle, I might see the numbers go wonky and slip in the "wrong" direction a little. I just don't freak out. I don't get real excited when I'm down a pound or two -- and I don't get the least bit fazed when it goes up. I can gain or lose that amount of weight overnight, depending on how hard I've worked out and how much water I've had to drink.
Oh, I think I should also mention that my BMI is 31. That's officially obese, by the way. So please, look at my pictures and see what obesity looks like. (Either that, or acknowledge that maybe BMI is *not* the end-all/be-all of healthy weight gauges.) I think that based on normal charts, since I'm 5'1" I should weigh ideally around 115 pounds. And that just ain't never gonna happen. I've got too much muscle and my tits are just way too big. So hell with the charts -- I'm voluptuous and gonna stay that way. I don't think I'm perfect right where I am -- but I'm not really concerned about "losing more weight" either.
Things that I've really noticed about the changes in my body are, well, yeah, I'm less fat. It really shows in my face, I think. My RoF is reducing in size -- but I've had two kids, and I *never* had a flat stomach even before they were born; I'm not holding out much hope that I'll be able to develop one now. What I find myself particularly excited about is the definition I can see in my arms. Even though my body fat is still pretty high (I don't know what it is, but all you have to do is look at me to know it's true), my arms are well-toned and change shape as I move & engage in different activities.
I also really like how flexible I am now. I can touch my forehead to all different kinds of parts of my body; I can bend and straighten my legs all over the place; I can lean forward & backwards & sideways really far -- while standing flat-footed...
I'm pleased with my body. I enjoy the clothes I can wear. I feel strong and healthy and energetic. I don't need any numbers to tell me any of this. I am living the truth.
Keep it up! (Score:1)
You know that I, too, have been working out the last year or so. I am so happy with the changes in my body. Yes, I'm sore for most of the week, but my chest is now bigger than my waist (48-46-46), which makes my stomach look smaller. The fat on other parts of my body has almost disappeared.
Goy is doing the same thing. She used to be really unhappy with her
Whoop whoop whoop! (Score:2)
This reinforces my own need to claw some gym time back for myself.
Thanks for being a role model!
Doing it (Score:2)
How do you keep yourself motivated? Especially before you had such dramatic results. What got you past "the hump", to a place where you can see enough results that it becomes self-rewarding?
I
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I didn't start exercising with any kind of goal in mind. I was just tired of being fat and lazy and unattractive and utterly invisible. I knew that if I started exercising, that my body would inevitably change -- and more importantly, that I would *feel* better and stronger and healthier.
Part of the deal was simply logistics. I found a gym that had childcare, but you have to sign your kids up a week at a time. Designating a specific time for myself t
Treadmill copout? (Score:2)
Re: obesity... for another reference, I was obese in all of the slashdot photo contests.
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Granted, I really need to work out, and I got plans on it (would rather be 'overweight' cause of muscle tone).
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sure, there are a few people who are so built muscle wise, that they throw off the index, but the fact is those peopl
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The only way women are happy is when they are anorexic, and even then, some think they are too heavy....
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balance -- so tough to find.
oh - and i did some more reading on bmi and it looks like there are some other indicators that are a lot better. body fat % and waist-to-hip ratio are a
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Given that many athletes are 'overweight' by the BMI and some people pretty much have to have ribs sticking out before they are in the 'normal' range I'm not sure it is necessarily the best yard stick.
Yo-yo dieting is far worse health wise than being overweight so if you are getting enough exercise and eating well then worrying about what the scale (or BMI) says might be more harmful than trying to starve yourself to the
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I myself fall into that category[1]. I know I need to get a lot more exercise, but even when I was riding a bike to and from work every day[2] I was carrying a fair bit more weight than I should.
The problem I see is most people[3] tend to misuse the BMI. Crash dieting is really bad. Far better to get enough exercise[4] and to eat healthy than to worry about what either the scale or your BMI say. Yes gradually working your way dow
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I can't ever get my heartrate up beyond mediocre, even when I boost the grade up into the double percentiles (and if I keep it within walking speed -- even at the fastest clip I can manage, it's still not enough).
I just started running on them -- but even so, I just don't cover a lot of ground for the amount of time I spend on it. There's also the issue of the shin splints that come from the impact
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Obese is a funny word. It makes me think of trian
Way to go... (Score:2)
*Plus, let's face it - for guys, I think the numbers are a little more consistent. For women, the monthly cycl
Way to go! (Score:2)
I decided to go the "scale numbers" route because I remember that when I was 165 I felt great. I feel much better than have in a long time, but I know that eventually I'll need to get off my butt and do some excercise.
Well done! (Score:1)
We are all built differently. And those of us who do meet the societial requirements still feel that anxiety that we are not perfect. It is a struggle we all go through -- to find peace and happiness within ourselves.
So I am *really* proud of you and happy that you are finding that peace.
*wolf whistles* (Score:1)
I think you just inspired me to re-start the Amazing Shrinking Zeriel Project, which I've been putting off. I did lose about 50lbs two years ago, but since then I've gained about 30lbs of it back. Any tips for making a lifestyle change "stick", or is it just a matter of exercising willpower and doing it?
Picture request (Score:1)
Prove it!
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That's too bad -- 'cause I was *this* close to deciding to a "yoga demo" album to show off a little bit. I think that'd be kinda fun, so even if I don't get any encouragement, I still might do it. Anyone who doesn't wanna look doesn't hafta.
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I wanna see bethanie turn herself into a human pretzel!
Hmm (Score:2)
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Thanks. Likewise, I'm sure. Ahem. But only if Tammy's part of the deal. (Please please please?)
....Bethanie....