“He who controls the past controls the future. He who controls the present controls the past.” -- George Orwell, 1984

I don't even know where to start on this one, I suppose I'll have to break it down. I can only speak regarding California; however, we have a large prison population so perhaps it's best to speak for it.

Long delays for trials...

If you demand a speedy trial it will be given to you or it will be dismissed. The continuance is something you will have to agree to. Defense attorneys usually request continuances repeatedly for various reasons. Rarely is it the people who make these requests.

A system where you must show up in person to defend trivial offenses...

I'm not sure how to define "trivial offenses", but I could only imagine you mean traffic infractions. I know in California you can fight a traffic ticket by mail (Trial by written declaration), and if you don't like the result you're still entitled to a court trial (Trial de novo). For any violation, Infraction, Misdemeanor, or Felony, your attorney can represent you without your presence in most circumstances (977 PC).

Clerks are not attorneys, they can not give legal advice. If they could, they would have a different profession.
A system so complex and full of contradictions...

I would need a specific example to defend this. Usually a law created is simple. It's defense attorneys that like to obfuscate things because confusing a jury pool is a good way to create a hung jury.

Laws set against social norms, specifically mentioning speed limits...

In California a speed limit has to be supported by a speed survey (exceptions for school zones, residential area, and a few other things). In this instance, they measure how fast cars are driving when conditions are ideal (light traffic, daylight, clear weather). They order them by speed and they find out how fast the slowest 85th percentile of drivers drive. That 85th percentile speed is an assumption that most people drive a safe speed, and they do not want to criminalize the majority. I imagine most states have similar laws. Next time you get a speeding ticket (it sounds like you have a few under your belt) request a speed survey for the portion of roadway you were on. You'd be shocked at how much faster than, "the flow of traffic," you actually drive. Speed cameras are illegal in California, as well as determining speed by measuring time elapsed over a distance.

Now there's the dubious 1mph over the speed limit ticket. I hear about this one all the time, and I see a lot of tickets; however, I have never seen this unicorn.

The purpose of traffic enforcement is to get the motoring public to drive safer. Traffic officers work on a traffic enforcement index. There are studies that show the more tickets you write in a city the fewer traffic collisions, and more importantly, the fewer fatal traffic collisions you have in that city.I personally find myself driving roughly 5 mph under the speed limit, even when I don't pay attention to speed limit signs. If you take your speed, take into account reaction time, and the fact that if you double your speed you quadruple your stopping distance, it makes sense. Speed kills. We drive on a road where everybody is in more of a rush than everybody else.

I don't mean to personally insult you, but perhaps you should reevaluate your driving habits for your own sake. Personally, I racked up my fair share of accidents and tickets in my time. Each of my accidents (I think collision is a more accurate word, accident sounds like it was not preventable) can be contributed to a "trivial offense" which ended up costing me a lot of money. I may not have enjoyed it, but each one of my tickets was earned. And for each ticket I received, I deserved 100 more.

For those of you complaining about the prison population in the US being so large. Go ask an inmate why they don't mind going back to prison. It's a nice place, they get education, food, healthcare, a place to sleep, and order. Our prisons are too nice, they don't care when they go back. It's a big game where they win no matter if they get caught or not.