http://images2.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20080202231409/uncyclopedia/images/1/11/Beating-a-dead-horse.gif

splitters

After finding that the words 'them', 'claim', 'Internet', 'is', '2011', and 'damn' were part of copyrighted works, the FBI has begun a strict crackdown on their usage, hence his obscuring them.

"Couldn't have gotten far in life without saying 'is'!"

up, up, down, down, left, right, left, right, b, a, start will get you the shutdown option

The "next life" thing is there to make some people feel better about their loss, make some people feel better about their gain, and to keep some people in charge of them all while they laugh all the way to the bank.

being slaves to the second most intelligent animals on the earth.

my kingdom for mod points

boo... just boo

I'm surprised no one else pointed this out yet

oh pfft, people only have empathy for users when they're paid to.

I don't think actually selling a product is always the intent. I suspect some people spam for the sake of wasting time and network resources to accomplish some moral imperative unknown to us.

Willis tower observation level? Man, I had to test that thing a few times with my foot before stepping out on it.

bloop

just coralize the link, add nyud.net after the hostname. in this case: http://www.techreviewsource.com.nyud.net/blog/?p=781

to teach better tucking