"But, for the less digitally inclined, plastic cards and those tiny metal chips will probably still be pretty cumbersome for the foreseeable future."
My mom has 70+ years and can shop the any local store with her card just fine. We use chip & pin over here. She can remember her card pin just fine. She's also not digitally or technically inclined. The whole thing takes a few seconds until the transaction is authorized by the bank.
What exactly is your excuse there, over the pond?
Banks have been issuing new cards (or replacing older ones) with NFC versions for at least a year. Just bonk and pay.