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Journal sielwolf's Journal: Slashdolt Wanks and Music 22

Journal by sielwolf

Hoorj! Another day, another damn /. article complaining about the RIAA. Of course this has less meat on it for the /.-heads to attack. It's about pirated cds instead of the virtual stuff so that takes most of the fire out of people's arguments but a major thread of thinking on the discussion is what Hemos says in the byline: I'm not sure that I agree that piracy is the reason for all of the music industry woes - I think creativity also has something to do with it.

Ok, when did all these jerkoffs become Paragons of Refined Taste? They couldn't smell creativity if they took the time to pop their heads' out of their collective asses for five minutes. *spank spank spank* Let's complain about boy bands and midriff divas when that fucking trend has been dead for over a year already. "Why can't music be like it was 10/20/30 years ago?" Well eat shit and die, moron. The world keeps on moving and you are now officially old as shit. Yep, like your momma and your daddy. Accept the fact that you like your music as a pure temporal coincidence. Everyone can learn to appreciate older music, but liking new stuff requires something rare around here: an open mind. Grandma prolly didn't dig anything faster or sassier than the swing of Glen Miller or Duke Elington. Fine. But she also wasn't so fucking daft to think that since she didn't like it, it must not be good.

Let's decypher some of their coded messages using our English to Wank/Wank to English dictionary:

"Too much production/post-processing" == "This must be that scary urban music People Magazine warned me about." Hip-hop, funk, dancehall, and breakbeat dance music can trace itself back for about thirty years now (probably older than say 50% of the /. population) but these folks still treat it with ribald xenophobia. Yes, it is non-traditional. Yes, it uses turntables, and a lot of mixer and sequencer magic. Yes, it is more about vocal cadence or no vocals at all. And, yeah, N'sync and Britney were derivative like all get out. But this music has a solid chunk of the charts now and much of it's good. Probably the extent of most slashbots is the "safe" hiphop market: Outkast, old school rap, or introspective nerdhop. People don't need to salivate over the next rehash Crunk sameness, but these folks wouldn't give Jay-Z or Pharrell Williams the time of day.

"X? This sounds exactly like Y?" == "I'm fucking tone deaf." Too many dickfores have musical intelligencia: folks who know more about the history of music and thus can spot modern pretenders just stealing someone else's thunder. Ok, yeah. But it is more than saying "Old Band's Name is the same as New Band's Name". If you cannot tell the fucking difference between Iggy Pop, the White Stripes, and the Rolling Stones you seriously should not be allowed to own music. This is the fucking "Did 6 million really die?" Holocaust revisionist shit of music. Yeah, if you fucking abstract music down to a retarded substrata, it is all the same. But you are a renob for doing it. What's next? "It uses a melody!!! It is just the same!!! [General Disarray Voice]: Simpsons' did it!"

What this all comes down to is arguments from people who have spent their entire fucking lives eating whatever the music industry shoved in their face. Since they are now out of it/don't like the music coming out now/have an agenda since they steal most of their music they then blame these same folks for either A) doing the same thing over and over again or B) not doing the same thing over and over again. They take no fucking responsibility over their own lives. They are fucking musical quadriplegics who have been nursed on the teat of the music industry; too fucking lazy to discover music for themselves. And note I didn't say the fucking RIAA. The slashdorks dehumanize the music industry by transforming it into a political bureacracy. "Oh! Only if the RIAA didn't exist we'd be saved!" It's the same sort of tepid logic that insists if we killed all the politicians in DC we'd all be better off. Little do they realize that these are bureacrats serving as representatives to their constituents. Listen up: the RIAA doesn't make Policy. It doesn't formulate Trends. You can't blame the RIAA for Christina Aguilera's popularity as much as you can blame George Bush for your local school levy.

I'm sorry but people are morons. The slathering mass of the mainstream are mental unsophisticates. And that's fine: they like it that way. They like only listening to Metallica and not Corrosion of Conformity or Motorhead or Dillinger Escape Plan. Music to them is background noise, something to overwhelm the silence between conversations. They think that "loving" music is listening to it a lot.

So they buy background music. Also known as shit. Always have. Bubblegum music has always been a staple of popular music. Can your friends sing to it? Can you drive to it? Does it have a simply digestible message? That's all they want. Throw in the few token "deep" acts that sneak through every generation, and you have the sum of mainstream music. That's the way it is folks, and that's the way it's going to be.

What the fuckwads of /. don't realize: they are the mainstream. Their tastes are shit. So don't cheese and whine about creativity when you have never demanded it in your lifetime. Yeah I could force everyone I know to listen to the wierd shit I like... but I don't. Because I'm smart enough to realize that some people only want *this much* out of music. They only want Metallica. Hell, shit, good for them. The beauty of a fucking democracy is that we can listen to whatever we want to. But when they get all erudite on a boy... hell, it's like any hack talking endearingly about the refined flavor and taste of eating a hot steaming cow turd. The pose of sophistication does not sophistication make.

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Slashdolt Wanks and Music More

Slashdolt Wanks and Music

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  • "X? This sounds exactly like Y?" == "I'm fucking tone deaf." Too many dickfores have musical intelligencia: folks who know more about the history of music and thus can spot modern pretenders just stealing someone else's thunder.

    What's a dickfore?

  • I found the rush article of a few days ago enlightening and +1 Insightful. But I've also been reading homerecording.com/bbs religously over the past few weeks (ever since I got my Fostex MR8)- so I'm bent towards such silly details.

    I realize that the articles != the silly rantings of the people, I just thought it was a worthwhile mention.

    But to get back ontopic- They all took the blue pill, or rather, the "Jagged little pill" (hahahaha! I'm soooooo witty!) so they should quit their bitching.

    P.S.- Santan
    • Yea, I noticed you changed your .sig, hence how I ended up here.

      You forgot that even if they have a point, that they're the most sophisticated and on the money music connoseurs[sic, to maintain that I am in fact on /.] around... it in no way justifies their actions.

      I mean if I broke into the local plant shop and stole large quantities of shit(see also: fetilizer) I'd still be stealing.

      I'm not real into music and I never have been. Most of the stuff I own I bought. Some of it got stolen[ah the breakup r
  • Comment removed based on user account deletion
  • ...last time I really bothered reading was when someone posted the link to the stuff that Janis Ian wrote about her experience.

    I occasionally look up what's up in the singles chart, just so I can maintain smalltalk in public. The rest of the time, I'm either listening to the radio, looking around on Amazon.co.uk, or using Soulseek to find new and/or interesting stuff. I think the closest I've come to the mainstream of late would be stuff like Kosheen or The Streets, but I think that was more a case of the
  • Excellent job my friend. You have clearly written something I have always felt and said (and written as well).

    Most (meaning 99.99%) of the population (and those here on /.) are lazy know-nothing, I-want-the-major-labels-to-spoon-feed-me-but-i-wi l l-cry-about-it-when-they-disappoint-me types that make me rather ill.

    Its a laziness, and blindness and an utter lack of awareness of an entire world of music that exists outside of the realm of the RIAA, major labels, MTV and Rolling Stone.

    Yeah, my primary musi
    • I'm glad to see the /. underground is in full-effect. Sometimes it seems like there are maybe a dozen or so rational heads out there.
      • Sometimes I feel like I'm the token /. hardcore-underground user. I always, well not always, but as often as my motivation will permit, post the merits of underground/independent music when the /. babies start crying rivers about the evil RIAA.

        Its funny, when ever I post something like "hey fuck the majors, support the independents and oh by the way here are some examples....." I usually get mod'd +5 Interesting or Insightful and then completely ignored. Its like being patted on the head and then told to g
  • slow. i ran out of stuff to do here at work. i'm about to go on my marriage vacation, so i don't want to start any projects i won't remember in a week and a half. point is that i've been bored today at work. then i decided to look through my/amigos. StB changed his .sig to point this way, so i found it quickly. my day is better for it. nothing beats a top notch rant for breaking worktime boredom.

    here's some kinda off-topic music opinions, since i'm too lazy to make a JE. i've been pretty happy with
    • I was tempted to get Pulse today. How is it compared to their classic EBM sound? Similar? Has it been modded up anyway?
      • the still and raw ep reminds me of geography era 242 made on modern equipment.

        pulse is different. i was disappointed at first because it doesn't sound the way i expected it to. i'd wondered how they could develop the use of electronic equipment. the singing is more mellow, but there is a depth to the mix and layering that is incredibly subtle yet intricate. i can't really think of anything to compare it to. if you have heard any of the male or female stuff, there is a similarity in the production. it

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