"Well instead of a guard dog, they had dis bloody great big Bengal Tiger. I managed to take out the tiger with a can of mace, but the shopkeeper and his son, that's a different story altogether. I had to beat them to death with their own shoes."

Amazingly, Wayne's World II is relevant! (for about 2 seconds)

I guess that's why I keep annoying people at work. I don't hear much with my right ear as I had a hearing loss on that side years ago.
Maybe that's also why my ex left me. She could never get any favours!