I've got to say that this scenario sounds all too familiar. I've been a contributing author for a couple of books and even co-authored one (name on the cover!). My last experience was for a Microsoft book with MS Press which ended not-so-well. People think that the publishers (editors, project managers, etc.) have a complete handle on the subject matter and are on the same page (no pun intended) with the authors. It couldn't be further from the truth 99.999% of the time. My last book project was supposed to be a useful administrator's reference and ended up being an 800 page advertisement for Microsoft products and a rehash of the online docs. Our project managers disappeared for months at a time only to finally resurface and demand the schedule be accelerated for no additional compensation. My own personal decision boiled down to quitting work for four months to write the book full-time and finish it or quit the book. Since advances are typically only a few thousand dollars against a VERY small percentage of the list price (think less than a dollar royalty for a $50 tech book, split among all the authors), I decided consistent income was a better option than having my name on another book.
Unless your name is J.K. Rowling or Stephen King, you will not get rich writing books, especially tech books where a run of 10,000 books is considered huge. You do it for the name recognition and that's about it.
Bottom line: the publishing process is totally not what you would expect it to be. In the end, your book will not really resemble what you originally envisioned.