If you think happiness is irrelevant you have failed to understand even the very basics of running a civilization. Most people are not like you. Your system, to be elegant, has to account for that.

So your hypothesis is that it would turn Finnish people into upper class Americans?

No, people are not featureless interchangeable spheres of uniform density. Taking 2000 from a dude with 1,000,000,000 and giving it to a dude with 10,000 means it will get pumped directly into the retail economy and benefit lots of people in the short term, as opposed to being pumped into the financial product casino, where it might benefit people over the long term but will more likely be chipped away into the pockets of other already rich people and serve primarily to make their net worth dick measuring contest tick over here and there, only occasionally entering the economy in a meaningful way.

I can't think of too many situations where a cow would be best suited as a work animal.

See: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Oxen . They're stronger than horses, albeit slower, and have quite a few working uses.

Using a word list like this: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/PGP_word_list would even make it safe(ish) for verbal communication.

I like this idea quite a bit.

My solution: chloroform. If it's fast-acting enough, then why not use it? Harmless, and pretty soon the victim is incapacitated with no harm done. Sadly, cops don't want that because they want to punish the victim.

Not sure if that was serious, but Chloroform is not quite as harmless as you see in television: http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chloroform#As_an_anesthetic

Runtime? So it's like Java then... it's interpreted. Ooookay, well, I suppose runtime languages have their place amongst the honored...

While I don't disagree with your assessment of the language, FWIW, all languages have runtimes, not just interpreted languages.

Personally, I bail when the content is a video. Give me back my plain text internet, please.

Videos are such a waste of time.

If it takes someone years to explain why I should like something, it isn't worth liking. There are more productive uses of that time that are equally enlightening and enriching and don't require me to duck my head into the cesspool of pompous ramblings that is modern music education.

A violent, war-like culture?
Why do you have to bring the USA into everything?

Confirmed: http://www.cyanogenmod.org/blog/domain-situation-has-been-resolved

So it's justified if I'm at a bar and someone talks shit to me, for me to fly to whatever shithole you live in and beat your skull in with a hammer? Sound logic.

What world line are you tunneling in from? In this one it's totally true.

You realize TNG started in the 80's, right?

In Texas judges are elected.