But why on Earth would anyone even consider running this abomination on a server, when there are many other, better languages designed specifically for server-side code?
Completely agree with everything you said, Efforts should be made to replace it with something better on the client side rather than helping it spread like some horrific cancer to the server side as well.
"The Avis WIZARD decides if you get to drive a car. Your head won't touch the pillow of a Sheraton unless their computer says it's okay." -- Arthur Miller