Comment Re:August (Score 1) 1146
"5) Always put your wife first. Her interests always trump yours, just as they would when you're dating. That might sound like an unbalanced relationship, but when it's reciprocal the decision process is each person advocating for the other."
That might work in the 'ideal' world, but, in the real world, you do that, and she will walk ALL over you for the rest of your lives together, and a chick that can do that, won't respect you, and often, will grow tired of you and leave you.
I'm not saying be a tyrant, but, you gotta have some balls, and call the shot more often than not. Give in on the things you really don't care about, but, don't cave on things you really do care about.
I've actually tried to follow this principle, and I must agree that for the first few years I did get walked all over. I knew it, even if my wife didn't. What has been amazing to see is her turn around. We now work on putting each other first in our marriage. We work together because of this, and it strengthens every aspect of our marriage. For those nay-say individuals out there, our sex life has increased over the years and is more frequent now than it ever has been.
And if we are still in our honeymoon phase, then I hope the next 13 years are as good as the last 13 years have been.
That said, it isn't easy. Anyone telling you something different is lying to you. There are difficult times; there are times when you may feel helpless, but these are fleeting, and if you can endure those well, your marriage and your love for one another will certainly grow and mature. Work through the difficult times together, focus on each other, and have a clear goal, a long term goal, that you both want to achieve. This will give you both a sense of purpose as you walk down the path of your marital experience together.