The Ubuntu £inux parasite is in full force. I have returned to tell you once again about the dangers of the Ubuntu £inux conspiracy. Ubuntu is taking over the world using BitTorrent to infect hard drives with abnormal software configurations. It is a virus spreading over the net and nobody, not even Microsoft can stop them. The knights at Microsoft are entering emergency preparation for a last plan to save users from the Ubuntu virus, but it is unlikely such a small company can compete against the Ubuntu Tycoons. Ubuntu is an invasion of privacy: It keeps work from getting done by handicapping users with LibreOffice, and it relays all data that passes through it to the NSA and Amazon.com . Will the forces of good prevail? Probably not. We should prepare for the armageddon of computing.
That's FUD. Ubuntu is a very good OS, at least more secure than Windows.
FORTUNE'S FUN FACTS TO KNOW AND TELL: A guinea pig is not from Guinea but a rodent from South America.