Productive?

I prefer to drink my life-juice from the horn of a freshly killed ox, just as the Vikings of old had. Wait, are you sure they didn't have Bawls back then?

Eh, I know for a fact that no matter where I go in Massachusetts, standard cable or DSL is still abysmally slow. I'm not about to pay the price for "premium" service though, which is still actually slower than one can get in just Greenwich, Connecticut.