An infinitely fast computer requires PAUSE instruction.

or Windows implementation :

void demalloc(void *ptr) { ptr = NULL; }

and IE implementation :

void demalloc(void *ptr) { free(ptr + 4); }

"How many PHDs does it take to change a light bulb?"

Nearby zero if you trust quantum physics and have a lot of time.

In fact this is the Warner Bros's acquisition by The Pirate Bay as M. Poisson d'Avril said.

Wikipedia says oceans covered 70,8% of Earth. But the question is how much is covered by water, not only oceans. So you must add seas, antarctic (ice is water isn't it), ... , this gives more than 75% !

Most programs offered just one user interface, but it could be easy to provide the user a choice level: simple, advanced, expert. The simple and advanced user interface levels should show only some parts of the Expert user interface, and this last level will be the one the programers will develop intensively.