Tell us you're an incel without saying you're an incel.
I was an Incel, to the age of 23. Back in the day when this technical term actually meant something and had utility, before effing idiots like contemporary mainstream press and media ... and perhaps you(?) hadn't yet "discovered"/hijacked the term and twisted it into some perverse infantile misandry propaganda combat term as it happened few years back.
Anyway, I was an Incel - which, btw., is and was a perfectly normal thing(!!) for an 80ies computer kid and insecure young male in a post-pill over-sexed and under-fucked society. A fact you perhaps aren't aware of due to lack of experience(?). And I suffered a lot because of it.
Then I met the mother of my daughter and we were together for 16 years.
Then the relationship deteriorated on her end, she had a short affair (that was f*cked up) and by chance and karma a women colleague and friend introduced me to Argentine Tango just at that time that was happening. I was 38 years old by then.
I got hooked on the Tango embrace, the vibe, the electronic tango music that was hip at the time (and still is to a degree), the dancing and the ladies. I went dancing 3-5 times a week and built my life around Tango for the next decade. I got into excellent shape by dancing 20+ hours a week and upped my Tango skills through the effing roof, so much so that the ladies were queueing up to dance with me (seriously).
I came close to and got intimate with women the vast majority of men - including myself only a few years prior - wouldn't even dare to dream of. Mad ecstatic honeymoon love (on both sides), epic pr0nstyle sex, super-orgasms, blowjobs in the hostel shower at the dance-event and lots of heartbreak after being dumped by the top-shelf ladies awash in sexual opportunity when they got bored and the next hot dude was on their radar.
And my metrics for women got completely upended. Women I had a crush on for years on end completely fell of my list and the perfect 10s that fucked and sucked my brains out epic style (and vise versa) completely screwed up my bare-minimum bar for women for all eternity.
2017 was my last high-point in Tango, when I visited Moscow for a summer Tango event. Moskwitshkas dance like no other type of women, they're in excellent shape, usually have years of dance and/or ballet training, have an embrace that's addictive like crack, know how to make a man feel like a man and - the important part - Russia has a severe lack of men due to early death by alcohol (and now perhaps stupid wars). Meaning even the average male leader can feel like a Tango demigod when in Moscow at the time, let alone someone who is Sir Dance-a-lot.
These days I'm single again and take the Tango subculture and it's bonfire of vanities and vanity-wounds with a grain of salt. It made me a man in a way I could have never dreamed of, but at 55 my SMV is past its peak and - as I mentioned - my standards for ladies are forever screwed up. I want an LTR as I have always wanted, but I've also finally gotten picky enough to rather pass than get involved with the wrong lady.
On the infantile denigration of hetero-male Incels
The current western public narrative on hetero-dynamics is awash in toxic misandry, infantile one-dimensional notions of men and such a disconnect from actual reality and what terms such as "Incel" actually mean and where they come from that I've lost all patience when it comes to topics like these. So, yeah, I was an Incel. In the actual original sense of the term. And if you think that's a reason to denigrate or make fun of those 80% of men who barely get a shot at women if at all, you can go and die in a fire for all I care. If you don't, perhaps you want to educate yourself on some basic human evolution.
I've seen both ends and gotten to know them well.
You have seen nothing is the drift I'm catching.