A day after he joined our group he went to the weekly [lack of] progress meeting which was scheduled from 15:30 - 16:00.

We had a couple of people who loved the sound of their own voices and would waffle on and on at length. At 16:00 precisely he said "That's it! meeting over!". When some objected he simply said "You knew the times of the meeting, the end time is not unexpected. If you cannot run a meeting on time, you cannot run a project on time!"

Shortly afterwards we also had a meeting where board level people attended. The Managing and Finance directors arrived 10 minutes late and demanded a recap of the meeting so far to which he answered "No! there's a dozen other people here, a five minute catch up would waste a man-hour." I don't think the directors had been spoken to like that and were taken aback, but egos aside they couldn't argue with the logic.

Within days, the effect was noticeable and we all (bloviators apart) appreciated him.

Assembler? Luxury!!

In my day we had to flip the switches for 1s and 0s ourselves !!

Although the Monty Python reference possibly appropriate (4 Yorkshiremen sketch was performed by the Monty Python team **), it is, sadly true.

Back in the ancient mists of time in the pre-dawn of history (well the mid 1970s), I actually did spend some time flipping switches and loading data into memory before the final crossing of fingers and jump to start location. only for a while because we then acquired the hottest gadgets around - a paper tape punch and reader.

** Yes, I know the sketch pre-dates the Pythons :-)

Oh I'm sure it will be, like a LOT of UI these days, very emotionally engaging.

I suspect that the emotions will be: frustration, annoyance, irritation, exasperation ...

I know I'm an old fogey, but I'd just like software to do what it's told - no 'interpretation', no 'personalisation', no AI hype -- just do what you've been asked to do and do it well.

"You know, the very powerful and the very stupid have one thing in common: they don't alter their views to fit the facts, they alter the facts to fit the views"

- Doctor Who (The Face of Evil, 1977)

Multiple tools?

Surely only

echo "You're using Windows"

would be sufficient.

What's the need?

We already have lettuces that out last prime ministers :-)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/...

I know you're joking, but there's an element of reality in this - at least in my case when I'm using a desktop setup.

Get QR on phone then either

locate a webcam I bought 15 or so years ago and try to get it to work or

root around under my desk; find the laptop that's plugged into the big screen; move it without disconnecting any wires (screens, usb hub, speakers, ethernet, power; open it up; remove the covering from the camera; contort myself so that the camera and phone can see each other and finally hope that it hasn't timed out !!!

Or just use Thunderbird to retrieve mail instead. At least until my gradual migration away from GMail is completed.

In the early 1970s there was a series on TV in the UK called Doomwatch. The opening episode was called "The Plastic Eaters" and featured just this scenario.

The story line was expanded into a full length novel "Mutant 59 - the Plastic Eater" by the original screenwriter.

the TV episode is now on youtube

https://www.youtube.com/watch?...

20 + years ago, the company I worked for set up an internal "social network" on its intranet.

It did have a rather simplistic and aggressive content filter.

For example: typing in "press down hard on the cover and turn the locking screw" would result in "press down *** the cover and turn the locking ***" Your post has failed content checks. You have been reported.

(I can't remember the exact text, but that was the gist)

Two things came as a result: either spurious spacing (eg sc r ew) and/or deliberately convoluted circumlocutions (eg "press down the cove with more than usual [but not excessive] pressure and rotate the locking device which is fitted with a raised helical structure")

Somehow, when they were looking for increased collaboration, synergies and innovation plus employee engagement, I don't think that this was what they envisaged/wanted.

Just typing that last sentence triggered my internal management speak filter.

In the words of Marvin, the paranoid android"

"Sounds dreadful"

Who would have thought that these companies would object to any curtailment of their parasitic behaviour?

Yet another case where two of the greatest quotes apply:

Basil's comment on Sybil ("Can't we get you on Mastermind, Sybil? Next contestant - Sybil Fawlty from Torquay. Special subject - the bleedin' obvious.")

and Mandy ** "Well he would say that, wouldn't he?"

** this is actually a slight misquote - but often used.

It would be better in reverse

One of the joys of being retired is never having to sit through another boring PowerPoint session again.

But for the benefit of those people who do have to suffer them, I'd like to see an AI development that "attends" a presentation and summarises the bloviating waffle (slides and voice) back down to a few key points.

Rather like

https://marketoonist.com/2023/...

Old joke

Over conversation in the pub one night, someone told Fred (as a prank) that french Bread was an aphrodisiac.

Next day, Fred goes to the baker and asks to buy GBP50 worth of baguettes.

The woman behind the counter says "Are you sure you want that much? By tomorrow morning it'll be as hard as nails?"

Fred answers "Great - give me GBP100 worth then !!"

Completely agree with you Mean Variance !!

There's a particularly annoying [to me at least] advert running in the UK at present.

it features an office type staring at a PC alone in the office after hours - (a stereotype of a working all hours banker type) who hears a colleague using a shredder. He leaps up saying "Don't do it, that document's the only proof we've got!" to which his mate replies "We don't need this, everone's gone paperless these days". The advert finishes with a voice over that TV Licences needn't be a drama and suggesting that we all go paperless.

To me that's wrong! Almost to the point of being dishonest and misleading.

And it's why I stick to having a paper licence; the paper licence is literally the only proof I have that I have a licence [apart from being a curmudgeonly old Luddite :-) ].

Paperless implies that I must trust implicitly that the records held are accurate, complete and up to date; one database error and there would be no proof that I have a licence. Given the history of government and quasi government (privatised and given to their buddies) with IT systems [most notably the Horizon scandal, but this is one of many], I have very little faith in "the system".

Paper documents and/or well maintained backups plus screenshots are an insurance 'cost' well worth enduring.

And before the usual rants about TV licences, this is not unique to them [but the advert is] - the same applies to banks, utility providers... the list goes on.

" Luke took it for a maiden flight which immediately resulted in yet another fire. This setback made Bell almost quit the project but he decided to remake all the parts and try again - which also ended in fire. "

Good on them for keeping on trying.

But I must say it reminds me of the classic scene ** :

"Everyone said I was daft to build a castle on a swamp, but I built in all the same, just to show them. It sank into the swamp. So I built a second one. That sank into the swamp. So I built a third. That burned down, fell over, then sank into the swamp. But the fourth one stayed up."

** If you need to look that up - you're either too young or insufficiently nerdy -- :-)