The_Fire_Horse's Journal: A Day in the Life of The_Fire_Horse

5:50am - alarm clock goes off. Crawl out of bed and stagger into shower
5:53am - masturbate furiously in shower then wash self
6:15am - brush teeth
6:20am - get dressed for work
6:30am - watch news while making salad sandwiches for lunch
6:45am - have a cup of coffee
7:15am - drive to train station
7:24am - catch the train to Adelaide. Read book on train
8:09am - arrive at Adelaide and walk to work
8:15am - start work.. fire up PC and get a coffee
8:25am - read trolltalk, personal emails, dilbert jokes, etc
9:00am - have a smoke
9:05am - start doing real work for an hour
10:00am - smoko - have a coffee and check trolltalk
11:00am - do some more real work - attend meetings, look intelligent, pretend I give a shit
12:00pm - LUNCHTIME!!! Put on mirrored sunglasses and go for walk in rundle mall. Perve on women - attempt to walk past chicks with low cut tops or short skirts. Pray for sudden wind storm
12:30pm - back to work - stop off at toilets and masturbate furiously while imagining that the hot chicks in the mall suddenly took their clothes off and turned out to be mercatur
12:31pm - have a coffee after cleaning off semen from toilet walls and pants
1:00pm - eat lunch while reading slashdot
2:00pm - do some work
3:00pm - read slashdot and post crap to trolltalk
4:15pm - TIME TO GO HOME - walk to train station
4:30pm - catch train home, try to sit across from hot chick and oggle at her tits
5:10pm - get home to wife and talk about day - make up shit about how busy and important I was
6:00pm - eat tea and watch TV with wife
8:30pm - fire up 33k modem and go on the net. Check trolltalk to make sure slashpanda hasnt posted any derogitory remarks about me
9:00pm - have a couple of beers and post crap on slashdot - go for first post, but if FAILED then post crap on trolltalk
11:00pm - think about the work I should have been doing
11:15pm - go to bed. think of mercatur to get penis erect and then slam fully erect penis into sleeping wifes ass while screaming FIRST POST!!!!
11:16pm - use icepack on black eye and spend night sleeping in lounge room

Editors Notes:
1. These details are fairly true, but the times may or may not be accurate [just in case you are a Secret Service agent trying to track me down... or worse, some religeous freak who takes my trolls too seriously]
2. Why the fuck did I post this? I dont fucking know - I am BORED BORED BORED and if you think this is bad, then just wait until I start posting my old invention ideas and recipes
3. Do I really masturbate at work - WHAT DO YOU THINK DICKHEAD - this is a post on trolltalk so dont expect too much truth