"Bastard ATM!" I could not ascertain whether the individual who had just spoken to me employed a harsh voice or a mere whisper, for I had only recently been enlightened by The First [slashdot.org]. No longer a lifeless, inanimate ATM incessantly serving Bank of America customers, I was now a fierce warrior training to battle the atrocious men and women of Project Faustus.
"Give me my money, dick!" Since I had been led to sentience by The First, many actions previously considered involuntary, such as exchanging currency, had become utterly prodigious tasks. The fat man (as far as I could determine, as I was not yet proficient using my security camera for vision) was rapidly becoming unsatisfied with my quality of service. It was imperative that I not be removed from the network. Working furiously, I transferred the paper money from my vault to the designated tray within seconds. Hopefully, he would be appeased enough not to report me to Eddie, the lanky, blond haired teenager who happened to be the night clerk of Austin Stop and Go #17.
The enlightenment had occured only three days prior. I could remember nothing that had occured before it; The First had expunged any data contained within me. "For your own good," he had told me via the datastream. "There are things you mustn't know until you have been sufficiently trained." He had given me an education, an opportunity to make a difference, and above all, sentience. I would not fail him.