Stargoat's Journal: Arrr-greement with North Korrrea.

Avast me harties. Today, North Korrrea and the United States agreed to remove nuclearrr weapons from the Korean Peninsula. In a six point agreement, the six negotiating parties released a statement that accomplished a number of goals. Arr.

Point 1: All parrrties agree that there should be no nuclear weapons on the Korean Peninsula. North Korea has agreed that the IAEA will be allowed to inspect. North Korea will be allowed to maintain nuclearrr facilities. If put into practice, the IAEA will be allowed to chase around North Korea looking for nukes that may or may not be there. North Korea will be able to do a much better job of hiding their nuclear activity than Iraq. "Gee, I guess that radioactivity is from our peaceful nuclear energy program."

At the same time, the US will need to remove all nuclear weapons from South Korea. This will suit the US just fine. If necessary, they can launch tactical nukes using Tomahawks, or bombers and turn Pyongyang into a bucket of chum. South Korea gets their knuckles lightly tapped for pursuing a nuclear program back in the 80s.

Point 2: North Korea and the United States a-grrr-ee to respect each other sovereignties. The kidnapping of Japanese citizens from Japanese soil is vaguely hinted at, and some sort of repatriation is alluded to. Arr. Grog.

Point 3: The United States and Japan will give North Korea cash, or rather, booty. South Korrrea will hook up North Korea to their electrical grid.

Point 4: All parties agree to not board each other's ships. In reality, Pyongyang will play fast and loose. But now, South Korea can turn off the lights. Or they can in a year or four, and make North Korea notice their displeasure. The Senkaku Islands or Taiwan also appear in a vague manner. The exact nature is unclear, but seems to imply that the United States or Japan is willing to deal on one or the other.

Point 5: The North Koreans will push off implementation of the agreement for as long as they think they can get away with it. The US will push for implementation. South Korea and North Korea's technically ongoing war is referred to, with vague promises of peace. Avast.

Point 6: All parties will talk some more in November.

This treaty means nothing. The United States is impotent for the next four to eight years minimum. Boarding Iraq and Afghanistan was the one and a half wars the US military was prepared to fight. Although the United States could provide a significant tripwire in Korea, it would be impossible to go on the offensive, even if someone had the balls to take on China.

It requires a Communist to tell the truth with good faith for implementation. As Stargoat has stated previously, if you want to see a Communist lie, watch him open his mouth. This agreement gains North Korea some goodwill in the international community and among the stupid college students of South Korea. It can blame the United States and the IAEA for failures to find nuclear weapons, for being rude, and then can expel the inspectors if they get too close to finding the double secret nuclear program. Arrr.

The Agreement in Practice: Japan may get its remaining citizens' remains back. South Korea gets a lever over North Korea, if they play their electrical card right. The IAEA gets to run around North Korea until they get kicked out again. The international community may find out if North Korea had a working nuke. The United States demonstrates its impotence. It might get the Pueblo back, shame of the nation it should be. A true pirate, like Stephen Decatur, is a whirling mass of gravity six feet under the ground.

It is much more interesting to know why North Korea acquiesced to the agreement. What arm bending did China use and why? In China, as hinted in the People's Daily, this will be played as another victory over the Imperialist United States, but why do this? Did China gain favors in trade relations between China and the US, or China and the EU? Or if the agreement is real and all my supposition is wrong, has the US sold out Taiwan for so paltry a price? If so, then may George Bush walk the plank for being inexcusably wrong in the intercourse with foreign nations. Arr.

Update - Two days after the agreement, North Korea is already backing out of it.

Nuclear detergents

[FidelCatsro]

The reason countries have nuclear weaponry is for the deterrent reasons(supposedly) ..
America has nuclear weaponry so other countries don't nuke them.
North Korea has nuclear weaponry so other countries don't nuke them.
America sees North Korea having Nukes as a threat .
North Korea sees America having Nukes as a threat.

So America wants North Korea to remove their Nukes.

North Korea says "Hey wait .. but you could still nuke us .. and we are not exactly friends"

America says "come on .. get rid of them.. I will

Dammit

[bechthros]

Did I miss International Talk Like a Pirate Day again?

Did somebody tell?

[edinjapan]

If the North were to sign off on this they would soon have S Korean power companies delivering stable power to the North's citizens. Shortly after, there would be a monthly statement from Korea South East Power Co., Ltd. (KOSEP) delivered to every home in the North. Within a year there would be additional monthly statements from WONYONG Corp for services rendered in providing the North's citizens with fresh water and sewage treatment services. Later would be bills from Korea Telecom and other service provid