Comment Re:Intelligent Advertising (Score 2, Funny) 354
Obviously you've never had a girlfriend
This is slashdot. You really could have simply ended your whole post there.
Comment Re:Lot's of possibilities (Score 0) 498
Raëlism - Wacked out UFO cult founded by a Frenchman in 1974 with anywhere from 2000-5000 followers globally
To be fair, though, most of the followers are in it just for the easy sex. I can just Randi confronting them. They will just reply "Okay, so it's complete bullshit. I just had *another* threesome with a couple of hot babes last night. I'm sorry, why did you say I should leave?"
Comment Re:Potato chips (Score 0) 554
Our school district doesn't allow most potato chips either. Sun Chips are okay, but Doritos or any type of potato chips you cannot have. They will take it away from your kids.
I attended elementary school in the '80s. Every time I see stuff like this, the school uniforms in public schools everywhere, the drug dogs and lockdowns, etc... it just makes me so sad. Also in the '80s, they were teaching us about the idealistic and practiced differences between our society and East Germany and the USSR, etc... US schools used to prepare children for factory jobs (schedule by bell ringing, etc...) Now US schools are preparing children for prison.
Yes, and I remember when our teacher told us about the horrible goings-on in places like Singapore, where they have surveillance cameras everywhere and the police record your every move. Surely, we'll never have something that horrible in the good ol' US of A! No sirree Bob!
Comment Re:Well.. (Score 0) 554
She's a Food Inspector at the North Carolina Division of Child Development and Early Education at the Department of Health and Human Services now.
That one sentence gives me at least three reasons why I would have divorced her, too.
Comment Re:Common sense (Score 0) 117
Back in MY day we didn't have high-fructose corn syrup and anti-depressants! No! All we had was cocaine, marijuana and LSD for our depression and nothing but pure, sweet honey harvested by Cuban children to tame our cravings for sweets.
Ug. You forgot the obligatory "And we were thankful!"
Comment Re:200,000 Years Old? (Score 0) 172
Could we put this one to rest, maybe?
Seriously, I can't recall the last time I heard a religious person make the claim. It's 100% sarcastic atheists. It's getting to be the airline food joke of the geekverse.
Try visiting the Southeast US. I heard this a lot when I was there. On second thought, don't visit the Southeast US. Just nuke it from orbit. It's the only way to be sure.
Comment Re:200,000 Years Old? (Score 0) 172
Mother nature called. She said that was very quaint and reminded humanity as a civilization that it would not be getting any dinner for the next five hundred years unless it smartened up, bathed, and cleaned its room, and stopped making excuses about imaginary friends that live in the sky.
Mother nature called. She said stop anthropomorphizing her, or she'll boil your ass in a bag and have that ass for breakfast.
Comment Re:I like their position (Score 0) 584
There isn't any sound precedent I'm aware of that establishes any kind of freedom from speech.
So, can I put up a jumbotron in front of your house (or, your mom's house if you live in the basement) and loudly explain at 3 in the morning what an utter fool I think you are?
Comment Re:Depends how it is funded. (Score 0) 583
Go to war because of some moon base? I reiterate: only a fucking politician would bother.
FTFY
Comment Re:Make it universal (Score 0) 720
God forbid we fear the 91 year old grandma.
Well, now that you mention it...
Comment Re:Same atoms (Score 0) 75
And why do they say *that* material is what we're made from? As far as I'm aware, we're made from the material of *our* solar system, not that of another.
Yeah, we certainly don't want any o' them thar furrin' atoms 'round here!
Comment Re:Good to see someone standing up against this ju (Score 0) 217
Even if the endeavor isn't successful, imagine how scared shitless the MPAA would be if we could get guys like Ron Paul and Ron Wyden to introduce a bill that would get rid of the Mickey Mouse Protection Act or other such nonsense. Furthermore, if we can convince guys like that to vocally campaign on these issues, it would do a lot towards raising awareness.
I can just see the news report now: "Congressman Ron Paul was found dead this morning in his house in Texas. While an avid critic of the so-called Mickey Mouse Protection Act, and an avid supporter of legislation to overturn it, his body was nonetheless found among singing 128 Mickey Mouse dolls. All 128 dolls were found simultaneously singing 'It's a Small World', which was then proceeded by a maniacal laughter."
Comment Re:ACTA Represents the End... (Score 0) 217
Ah, yes. Like so many other things from Tsarist Russia - big, overbearing, and ultimately impractical and useless. I guess this museum piece monstrosity could be used to launch people out of it. Because, in Tsarist Russia, cannon fires YOU!
Comment Re:Lesson 1 (Score -1) 199
Don't steal from the government - it hates the competition
Suicide. It's a game your whole family should play.
Comment Re:Isn't that anti-science? (Score 1, Funny) 1055
[climate denier mode] See! I wave it off! [whisks hand through the air *woosh!*] Off! Off! See? There, it's gone.[/climate denier mode] I only wish I was joking, but this is ultimately what evolution and climate deniers do. Once you destroy their arguments with pesky things like logic and facts, they revert to making mocking gesticulations and facial expressions. If you really keep at them, they may get violent, or at least begin to throw feces.
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