My Complaint about Project Gutenberg (Score -1, Troll)

What do indecent braggadocios, what I call wretched, condescending beggars, and Project Gutenberg have in common? If you answered, "They all burn books," then pat yourself on the back. Wait! Before you dismiss me as hate-filled, hear me out. Project Gutenberg is too pathological to read the writing on the wall. This writing warns that every time it tells its expositors that merit is adequately measured by its methods and qualifications, their eyes roll into the backs of their heads as they become mindless receptacles of unsubstantiated information, which they accept without question. Project Gutenberg has only one goal: to label everyone it doesn't like as a racist, sexist, fascist, communist, or some equally terrible "-ist". Project Gutenberg's double standards are not the solution to our problem. They are the problem.

I can only denounce Project Gutenberg's perorations if Project Gutenberg's army of the most profligate swindlers you'll ever see is decimated down to those whose inborn lack of character permits them to betray anyone and everyone for the well-known thirty pieces of silver. Project Gutenberg and licentious poseurs are cut from the same cloth. This position, in large part, parallels civil libertarianism, but with particular emphasis on the fact that Project Gutenberg's speeches are full of declamation, bloviation, obfuscation, and equivocation. We can therefore extrapolate that Project Gutenberg is trying to brainwash us. It wants us to believe that it's delirious to protect innocent, little children from unreasonable, money-grubbing lunkheads like it; that's boring; that's not cool. You know what I think of that, don't you? I think that prudence is no vice. Cowardice -- especially Project Gutenberg's intrusive form of it -- is. Under these conditions, Project Gutenberg is terrified that there might be an absolute reality outside itself, a reality that is what it is, regardless of its wishes, theories, hopes, daydreams, or decrees. You can see exactly where this is going. While this lighthearted statement adds sorely needed humor to an otherwise tense situation, the reason Project Gutenberg wants to put increased disruptive powers in the hands of hateful lummoxes is that it's thoroughly grumpy. If you believe you have another explanation for its soporific behavior, then please write and tell me about it. Now that this letter has come to an end, I surely hope you walk away from it realizing that Project Gutenberg's indifference only adds to the problem.