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Darth Vader Robs Long Island Bank 190

Apparently the destruction of the second Death Star has stretched the Galactic Empire's coffers so thin that Lord Vader himself is robbing banks. From the article: "Impotent Rebel Alliance security forces tell Newsday (paywall) that Vader marched into a Chase bank in Setauket around 11:30 a.m. today. Brandishing a completely unnecessary handgun — as he had the power to choke the oxygen out every teller's throat — the fallen Jedi demanded cash."

North Korea Announces Achieving Nuclear Fusion 372

aftertaf writes "North Korea claims to have achieved nuclear fusion by building what it describes as a 'unique thermo-nuclear reaction device.' This announcement was met by skepticism on just about every news website this side of Saturn. Pyongyang claims its latest scientific breakthrough coincides with the birthday of the country's founder and eternal president Kim Il-sung. This is not the first time it seems that the laws of nature have been bent in his honor. According to official biographies, when his son, Kim Jong-il, was born, a new star appeared in the sky." No doubt the Dear Leader combined the atomic nuclei by hand.

Comment I hate these Reports (Score 5, Insightful) 350

I always think these are stupid, why not throw in the fact that 90% of pirated software is never actually used more than like once or twice if even used at all. Or the software doesn't even function the way it was intended to or it flat out doesn't work. How about the fact that the software most likely wouldn't even be bought in the first place so they aren't actually loosing any money from this because it would not equate to earned revenue. Why doesn't someone come out with a useful report that actually shows these facts. Douches.

Website Sells Pubic Lice 319

A British website called will help you prove that there is literally nothing you can't find online by selling you pubic lice. A disclaimer on the site says the creators "do not endorse giving people lice," and the lice are for "novelty purposes only." The company also boasts about a facility "where we do all of our parasite husbandry and carefully considered selective breeding." Three different packages are available: "Green package - One colony that can lay as many as 30 eggs for about $20. Blue package - Three colonies to share with your friends or freeze a batch or two for about $35. Red package - A vial of 'shampoo-resistant F-strain crabs' which can take up to two weeks to kill for about $52."

Comment This should not be an Issue (Score 2, Interesting) 902

US Law only requires that you enter the amount of people living at your residence. The census does NOT require you to enter anything beyond that. If you are dumb enough to enter your phone number, race or anything else and expect it not to be used against you in some way, then it is your own fault. Seriously, it's like signing up for a website online - they may ask you to enter personal information even though it is not required. You don't see me complaining about those websites asking for my phone number (or anything else that is personal,) and then getting mad when they call me. I deserve the invasion of privacy because I was stupid enough to provide them with my number in the first place. Instead I just don't enter my phone number. Most of the time they don't required that field in the first place; if it is required I would either make it up, or just not sign up.

People that think the government is not going to use this information in some manner are living in a hole. It's the government this is what they do, move on and stop being so naive and think before you blindly fill out anything, because trust me, it is going to be saved and sometime down the road it may, this is not me saying it will happen, but it MAY be used against you.

Be smart, enter the amount of people living at your place, and mail in your census. Problem solved.

Comment Re:Threat or Warning (Score 2, Insightful) 241

According to Jonathan Schwartz, Steve Jobs told him "If you move forward to commercialize it, I'll just sue you." over the phone after Sun presented Looking Glass, a desktop concept similar to Mac OS X's....

I may not be a Mensa member but I think I may be smart enough to describe that as "Steve threatening to sue...."

Comment Grow Up@ (Score 4, Interesting) 241

According to Jonathan Schwartz, Steve Jobs told him "If you move forward to commercialize it, I'll just sue you." over the phone after Sun presented Looking Glass, a desktop concept similar to Mac OS X's. After that, Schwartz put Steve in his place:

"Steve, I was just watching your last presentation, and Keynote looks identical to Concurrence – do you own that IP?" Concurrence was a presentation product built by Lighthouse Design, a company I'd help to found and which Sun acquired in 1996. Lighthouse built applications for NeXTSTEP, the Unix based operating system whose core would become the foundation for all Mac products after Apple acquired NeXT in 1996. Steve had used Concurrence for years, and as Apple built their own presentation tool, it was obvious where they'd found inspiration. "And last I checked, MacOS is now built on Unix. I think Sun has a few OS patents, too." Steve was silent.

I personally think it all of this suing is petty and dumb. This reminds me of when I was about 10 and when my little cousin would always say "I'll sue you" whenever he didn't get his way. Personally I think all these CEO's need to grow up and realize all they are doing is hampering technology and the advancement of the human race.

Submission + - Hackers Steal Millions in Emissions Certificates (

Reber Is Reber writes: Credit cards numbers? Please. Medical records? Booooring. The modern hacker knows that the real money's in carbon emission trade credits. No, seriously: it's estimated that in a recent phishing expedition the hackers stole 250,000 carbon credit permits from six companies worth more than $4 million.

The hackers sent emails to 2,000 companies in Germany alone, claiming to be from the German Emissions Trading Authority, which keeps track of carbon credits and transactions. The email requested that the companies re-register their accounts, and the information the duped employees provided was then used—you guessed it—to access the companies' GETA accounts and and clean them out.

It's unclear who the thieves sold the credits to, but the buyers are assumed to have thought they were making a legal transaction. And it's also possible to see how it would have taken some time to see that something was amiss: four million bucks is a lot of money, but it's a drop in the bucket of $130 billion of CO2 emissions that were traded in Europe last year.

So remember, kids: lock up your gasses. People will steal just about anything these days.


Submission + - Sony Interested in Challenging Apple's IPad (

Reber Is Reber writes: Sony hinted on Thursday that it's preparing a challenger to Apple's upcoming iPad.

"That is a market we are also very interested in. We are confident we have the skills to create a product," said Nobuyuki Oneda, Sony's CFO, who was speaking at a Tokyo news conference held to announce the company's quarterly financial results.

Oneda didn't provide any details of any planned products but did say Sony is eyeing a similar market to the upcoming Apple gadget. "Time-wise we are a little behind the iPad but it's a space we would like to be an active player in," said Oneda.

Sony said in October that it plans to launch a number of new mobile products that are built around network-based services. The devices will connect into Sony's new online service, an Internet-based store that will bring music, movies, games and electronic books to a range of Sony products including Bravia TVs, Vaio PCs, Walkman music players and Reader e-book readers.

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