Wow, COLLEAGUE. It's Saturday morning, I claim immunity.

They pay these people for doing literally nothing. A very well known college of mine is paid a well above-average salary by ManTech to answer perhaps one help desk call a day. He does literally nothing, all day long, most of the year. He is not allowed a cell phone or a laptop or browsing access for security reasons, so he tells me he just counts ceiling tiles.

I guess in this case, the banjo tuned him.