Yow indeed. But I can beat your worst time, even though I've suffered far less on the others. The first time I flew without my parents - a school skiing trip - we took a bus to London Gatwick, and sat there all day because Milan was snowed in. The airline stuck us in a hotel for the night, and flew us out the next day. To Pisa. Where they put us on a bus to Milan, where we got on the other bus to the ski slopes. The delay wasn't a lot longer than yours - but that was supposed to be a two hour flight...
They've never lost my luggage, although they have broken things. Probably tempting fate to write this, as I am flying to Milan for the second time in my life on Wednesday!
For short trips planes are worth avoiding. St Pancras direct to Gare du Nord is much better than LHR-CDG then RER to the city.

Oops! Trying to close the html tag, you can tell I work in C++!