I don't believe to two seconds that there were no indications that she could do this kind of thing. My guess is that you never knew she could do this kind of thing *to you*. You mean to tell me that she never showed that she was self-centered, and didn't take responsibility for her actions in all the time you were together? Seriously? Never turned on one of her friends? Never did something bad and then blamed others when she got caught for it? Never acted like she was entitled to things she didn't earn? Never?

The problem is that people need to understand that you really don't know someone until you see them in a crisis situation, and that can take years. However, watching their general behavior can tell you much. Most people will rationalize their SO's bad behavior by saying "she would never do that to me though".

DVCS allows trivial re-integration

I have read about DVCS's, and I understand how merges are much easier. However, you say that providing them read-only access will make merges "trivial". Is this true in all cases? What if their work takes several months. And in that time, what if they extensively change an existing class that has been deleted in the main code base? How is the merge trivial in this case?

Here's the thing, if he was going to sacrifice others for his ambitions, he should not have married and had kids. He made an obligation to his wife and kids and showed he was not up to being a man by sacrificing them for his goals. But I am glad you got something out of it, really I am.

Spoken like a true self-centered son-of-a-bitch. Fuck everyone as long as I get mine, right?

But then you don't get automatic notification of updates, which can be frequent.

No, I'm not an Apple user, I primary develop on Windows, but I do use Apple and Linux products regularly.

It is a widely held belief that "stupid average users" are not smart enough for linux and that is why linux is not popular, but in reality it is because most applications written for linux have a hard to use interface. Even geeks want an easy to use interface. I would posit that is why Ubuntu has made such strides in the linux community, because it has progressed the "just works" bar. However, it still has a long way to go.

Listen, when you have a real job and other priorities in life (a wife, kids, house, etc) and just need to get things done, it no longer becomes a situation about not being smart enough to figure something out, it is having other priorities that need to get done. The more intuitive the user interface, the wider adoption that program is going to have, with geeks and non-geeks alike. As a geek, if I don't use a program regularly, coming back to it 6 or 12 months later means that if it isn't well written, I need to expend a considerable amount of mental energy to accomplish a task. At a certain point, the ROI is no longer there.

Let's say that I want to edit a photo of my kids and "fix" the photo with the tools in discussion (Photoshop and Gimp). Taking cost out of the equation for the moment, if I have the latest Photoshop on my machine, I will look into using whatever it has built in to get the job done. However, if I have to install a plugin for either tool, it is highly likely, even as a geek, that I would say "it is good enough" and move on because the boys want to go outside and play ball.

Yes, to the average user it does.

The Free Dictionary would seem to disagree with this definition

I understand the logic of your thinking. I really do. I am a software developer, so my "product" is essentially the same as yours.

However, I would suggest that you have a misunderstanding on what you should get paid for. It isn't for the end product, which is not directly comparable to what some other artisan would get paid for in the past (a concrete object). The simple reality of the situation is that bits that have no cost or difficulty being reproduced are just not going to be re-sellable. It is as simple as that.

So what do you and I have that we can "sell"? Our skill. I get paid by my employer for the TIME I spend writing code for them. Your employer? The paying public. Play a gig at a bar or other venue and get paid for that performance. Now you can make a living. It cannot be easily reproduced by other people, so you have a product that its all your own. Will you make millions doing it? Probably not. But it is an honest living.

You do do this because you love it, right? Not for the money?

You're frustrated because your expectations do not match reality. When this happens most people try to change reality. That works in many cases, but in this case I would say this is not going to happen. Changing your expectations is the only way you are going to be happy.

[Citation Needed]

I went back to school when I was 31. I went to a trade school and graduated with an Associates when I was 33. I got a job for about 35k a year (midwest). I am now 41 and make 80k a year.

The main reason I did not get a four year degree is the same reason you are having concerns - at my age I felt I was too old. However, by being ambitious and working hard I feel I am doing as well as I would if I had a bachelors degree.

If IT is what you truly love, then learning on your own is what will drive your career. The degree just gets you your first job. After that it is experience that matters most. There is no job I could not get now even though I don't have a bachelors.