Crack Dealer: Dream Job for Help desk Techs.

A Jumble of Thoughts by

The Lord Of The Beer

I was shortly after dealing with a particularly clueless user (Sever Stupidity Condition of the Tech Alert Chart does not begin to describe her) when I begin to think of Career Moves.

Strangely the best Career that comes to mind is Crack Dealer.

The advantages are many and I will list them

1) Make your own hours. No more nine to Five grind. I get up when I want to. Go where I want to. When I want to. IF the customers don't like it, fine no crack for them. I could be the crack-nazi. Other advantages to making your own hours; Spend hours posting on Slashdot, might even get a first post and don't need to worry about getting caught. No more pointless lectures on "Valuable company time", followed by the boss going into his office to look at golf results. If I want to spend all day on the latest Civ game, I can.

2) Money. Crack Dealers got it. Help desk clerks don't. There was a post on Aspectus.com the other day that said basically that your wealth determines your importance to society. Crack Dealers have more money thus are more important to society. Improve your standing in Society. Sell Crack

3) Respect. Ever had someone say get out of the way here comes a Help desk tech. Exactly

4) Sex. Has a lot to do with 2 & 3. No more getting the hand drunk for me.

5) No paperwork. Yup. No Productivity reports, Performance reviews. No mission statements, Language guides, dress codes or whatever the fuck else HR is dreaming up to justify their existence. Done with it.

6) Get to shoot people. The ultimate in stress relief. Somebody complains about the crack you sell them, SHOOT THEM. Then afterwards hunt down some of your old helpdesk customers, "Hello Mary-who-could-never-figure-out-how-to-cut-and -paste, I would like you to meet my friend MR SHOTGUN"...Sigh. Oh Happy Day

7) My Parents would understand what I do for a living.

Of Course there are some down sides too

1) Jail This is definitely a down side, Locked in a small room, told what clothes to wear, when to eat, sleep, shitty pay... My old Life back... But on the plus side NO MISSION STATEMENTS....Yay. And I can still spend all day playing CIV III if I want to ... Ok so I will occasionally get butfucked in the shower. That lasts...what five minutes, as opposed to some company buttfucking me my whole live. SIGN ME UP.

2) IRS. The Taxes will go WAY up. Sigh.

Yes That's right Selling Crack: a way of dignity

Think About it.

LOTB

Ever notice how it is so easy to get angry on the net.

Somebody says some thing... and I (hopefully I am not alone in this) Fly off in a rage. I am not angery about the post nor ashamed that I posted it. I am ashamed that I allowed someone to get my goat so easily.

I do not think I would do that in a face to face conversation, so why is it so easy to do this on the net.

There is some thing seductive about the "facelessness" of the web, even If that facelessness is largly an illusion. (I doubt that it would be hard to get my adress from the web)

Any body else finding this.......

Actully I wrotein the journal before...I am wondering what happened to it.

Does anybody read these things