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Lord of the Rings

Journal Liora's Journal: Seem to have had a breakdown this morning... 13

Journal by Liora

I have been fighting back tears all morning. Not sad tears, not really happy tears, not really grave or somber tears either, some kind of other tear I am unfamiliar with. I guess sometime while puttering around this morning listening to country music (I do that when I'm in a certain mood... don't worry... it doesn't happen often) I had the great mother of all realizations: I'm getting married. I'm going to stand up in front of a church full of friends and family and pledge to love and honor and cherish shimmin until death do us part. I'm getting teary just thinking about it... This is weird... I've never cried at a wedding before, so the prospect of crying about my own is really strange.

It's not sad really. It's beautiful. But it's scary, and although I know I will mean all of those things (I would mean them if I were to say them today even) there's something very serious about it. Something I didn't get about love and marriage and relationships and God and I don't even know what else. I'm only starting to get it now. Like when shimmin told me that he cried all through his sister's wedding because she was crying all through her wedding and I asked why, and he said it was because his sister was getting married I didn't get it. I still don't get it. I'm not sad at all, but I'm not really sure why it is I keep nearly bursting into tears. Can someone explain it to me? Thanks.

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Seem to have had a breakdown this morning... More

Seem to have had a breakdown this morning...

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  • My wife sobbed her way through our wedding. In the pictures, she's terrified-looking before the ceremony and beaming afterwards, but covered in tears the whole time.

    The most amazing performance I've seen was my brother in law's mother at his wedding. There was literally a continuous stream of tears pouring off her face during the ceremony.

    • That'll be me... except that I hope that I can manage to be beaming and tear-covered the whole time... I don't think that anybody wants to see me terrified...

      See... I've seen people cry during someone else's wedding (usually parents of the bride), but not during their own weddings.

      I suppose only time will tell how much I cry.
  • I've never been one to get misty-eyed at crappy love songs( and only rarely with the good ones), but I've been getting teared up quite often since Meg and I have been engaged. I think it's just finally having a definite defined absolute person to relate to when that sappy song comes on. it's almost overpowering.
  • Can someone explain it to me?

    No. (and don't believe anyone who says they can :-)

    I wouldn't call it a breakdown either -- sounds like everything is functioning as it should.

    Emotion is good.

    Congratulations and good luck.

    • > Emotion is good.

      Thanks. Sometimes I forget that. I'm so afraid of being called a flaky female that I often forget it's actually ok to show some feelings now and then.
  • I'm quite stoic in all my attitudes. I've rarely cried since I was like 16. I was balling while saying my vows.

    It isn't bad. It isn't a breakdown. Its what you truely should feel if you are ready to be married.

    Good luck and extra congrats :-)
    • Yeah, I feel better now. I'm not bleary-eyed anymore. So people really DO cry during their weddings. I've heard about it, but never seen it.
  • couldn't stop cracking up at his wedding when the minister was reciting the vows. I felt embarassed for him, but I imagine it was a similar reaction, instead of crying, he was laughing. Weird.
  • Everything will be okay.
    If you were a man I would urge you to do what I did, go through the whole day drunk off my ass.
    It's one of the top 5 stressful situations in life, you have a natural right to get bent outa shape about it.
    You will do fine.
    • The way I got over it, was by having a pre-wedding marriage. Small affair, just her family, ran through it in under 45 minutes, and got a piece of paper saying we were legal. That made the other big day a walk in the park. Hey! I was already married! What is there to worry about?!
      • I'm not sure I'd really want to do that. Planning one wedding sounds stressful enough... much less planning a mini one and a regular-sized one. I'll be ok... I know I will. I just lost it for a little bit this morning.
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