A UK bookmaker has lowered the odds on proving that god exists to just 4-1 to coincide with the switching on of the Large Hadron Collider. The chance that physicists might discover the elusive sub-atomic object called the "God particle" has forced the odds lower. Initially the odds that proof would be found of God's existence were 20-1, and they lengthened to 33-1 when the multi-billion pound atom smasher was shut down temporarily because of a magnetic failure. A spokesman for Paddy Power said, "The atheists' planned advertising campaign seems to have renewed the debate in pubs and around office water-coolers as to whether there is a God and we've seen some of that being transferred into bets. However we advise anyone still not sure of God's existence to maybe hedge their bets for now, just in case." He added that confirmation of God's existence would have to be verified by scientists and given by an independent authority before any payouts were made. Everyone getting a payout is encouraged to tithe at least ten percent.

Lingerie maker Lucia Lorio has caused outrage with her latest creation, a new line of lingerie that comes equipped with a GPS tracking system. Feminists have objected strongly to the new line. "It is outrageous to think that men can buy this, programme it and give it to their partners and then monitor them," said Claudia Burghart, leader of a Berlin feminist group. Lorio counters, "This collection ... is a wink to women and a challenge to men because, even if she gives him the password to her GPS, she can always turn it off." I'm glad I'll finally be able to ask, "Is that a tracking unit under your dress or are you just happy to see me?"