Holy Shit It's Magical (Score 1)

I literally cried when I heard this news. Sometimes there's so much beauty in the world, I think my heart will burst. I felt this way when when I bought an iMac, iPhone, iPad, magic mouse, magic keyboard, and when I rode magic mountain. Last night, I bought a USB cable from Apple and when I got it home and opened it, I immediately broke down crying. On one end, there was a USB A connector and on the other end a USB B connector. KABLOOOMM! Mind blown! Why has no one else thought of this? Because, and this is obvious, they think same. I can't wait to bask in the magic of this new display. My only concern is priapism. When I got my iPhone it didn't go down for 8 days, and my doctor told me it was dangerous. Then I showed him the phone and BOING, the doctor suddenly became a patient. He had the same problem as me. We figured right then and there that we might as well have a sword fight since we both came armed ... if you know what I mean. Now if you'll excuse me, I have a line to go and stand in. I find that if I more or less just live in front of the Apple Store, I tend to get a pretty good place in line. Of course, I also do the payroll deduction options to pre-pre-pre-order all of my iStuff. I'm not going to risk getting something the day AFTER it's released. I love me too much. People often ask me, "Well-endowed Bob (I can't help it, that's what they call me), does it bother you that Apple uses sweatshop labor?" "Let's got something straight", I reply, "Apple could single-handedly re-instate both slavery and the holocaust, and make the blacks and jews fight to the death for Tim Cooks personal enjoyment, he could burn the losers until he'd melted all of the polar ice caps, and he could ban gays from all Apple Stores while handing out buttplugs which read "No Fat Bitches or Fanny Bandits" ... and I would still write them a blank check every couple of months to receive whatever work of art they're selling. You know I'm not alone either.