E-Rock-23's Journal: A Geek In Love, Part One

OK. In all honesty, I'm not the hardcore geek that alot of /. users are. I'm not a big-time Linux guru (though I do know enough to get by), I don't really have extensive knowledge of "real" programming languages (which is best is a constant debate, one I'd rather stay out of), and I most certainly don't fit the stereotypical "geek image" (I don't live in my parents' basement, download pics of Star Trek hotties, closest thing I do have is I wear glasses, which doesn't really count for much). But yeah, I'm a geek in it's most basic sense. I like small doses of Sci-Fi, dig on Fantasy stuff, RPGs are a favorite (both LA and digital), and I'm a big-time Anime fan. Plus, with an extensive (at least for my area of residence) knowledge of computers and associated this-n-thats, I guess one could say that I'm, at the very least, a part-time geek.
 
One thing that sets me apart form the stereotypical "geek" persona is that I have a very healthy social life. Now before you get on my case about "not all geeks are shut-ins with no lives," I'm well aware of that fact. Some of my friends here on /. have interesting lives (like gmhowell and his homebrew, which I think is the king shiznit of coolness). But mine, well, mine almost feels like a movie, when I think about it. All people have those moments where they feel that even what's happening before their eyes is as surreal as something you'ld see on the silver screen. But me, my entire life has been like that.
 
One of the biggest things in that department is my love life. And since I'm fairly notorious about spilling my heart out onto the virtual table on my website, I figured I'd spit it out here as well. Who knows. Maybe some prominent /. user will read this and think "hey, maybe that kid does have a hit movie in his hands." Wishful thinking, I know. But I digress...
 
I've had my fair share of girlfriends in my life. I remember my first crush on a girl named Jamie Murarik when I was in kindergarten. That begat the first crush I had that was actually returned, a girl named Marlena Dickenson in second grade. The first time I kissed a girl other than my mom? Jamie again, when I was in third grade at a football game. And it was a sneaky moment, let me tell you. LOL.
 
But I wasn't going to find out what true love was until I was 17. That, my friends, was when I met Amanda Jill Mitchell.
 
In the latter half of my high school days, I was a band geek in the loosest sense. My love for music was (and still is) dedicated to Rock and Roll, but I still wanted to do what I could with the school band, so I asked Mr. Feigh if I could help out. He responded by letting me be band manager, assistant, and public address announcer at football games (calling out the show script from the press box). During the summer, I would put on a white collar shirt, dress pants, and a tie and march along side the band in parades, making sure everybody was kept hydrated and fixing little problems with instruments. It was through these parades that I began to make friends from other local schools. One of those friends was Jill Eirich (pronnounced like my first name, Eric) from POHS. Through her, I met Jill Mitchell.
 
Around that time, I had just gotten my first car, a Ford Escort which I eventually drove into the ground. On quite a few occasions, I would drive to POHS after I had gotten out of MVHS to hang out with my friends there in their parking lot after they got out of classes. Jill was one of them. We became rather close friends fairly quickly. We'd sit in the parking lot and sing songs together. She had the most beautiful voice. One particular song we'd sing was the movie version of "Can You Feel The Love Tonight" (Elton John/Tim Rice) from "The Lion King." When it came to Simba and Nala's parts, I bet you can guess who did which part. That was when I first started to look at her with affection, the way she looked at me when she sang her verse. It was then that the hopeless romantic known as Eric Jacobson was born.
 
After those initial days in the parking lot, I started to go over to her house. There, we'd sit in her room and talk for hours on end about whatever came to mind. For Christmas in 1994, I bought her a teddy bear, which I named Ozzy. She fell in love with it on the spot, and that made me happy. I had done something to make her just light up with joy. At that moment, I knew that this was something more (at least to me) than just a simple crush.
 
But, that all came to a halt one cold, snowy night in February of '95. After an argument between myself and her uncle, I was told to leave. I couldn't do so without saying goodbye, though, and trudged through the snow to her windowsill. It was there that I told her I was going to Boston with some friends for a while, and didn't know when I'd be back. I don't remember much of what else was said, all I remember is the one simple kiss we shared right there. In my mind for years to come, I was (and still am) able to picture that one instant from every possible angle. I walked away, sad that I had to go, but I knew then that it that love was what I was feeling. I knew what love was for the first time in my life.
 
An interesting aside: Years later I came to find out that her house had burned to the ground, all except for the brick chimney, and the very same windowsill where we said goodbye.
 
That night would be the last time I would see Jill for over six years.
 
During that time, I went through a whole bunch of changes. I moved to Pittsburgh to attend college at the Art Institute, and even had an engagement go south with a girl named Erina Wilsoncroft. That one was rather harsh, and sent my life on a downward tilt for a while. After school (and an extra year living in the city), I came back home. After talking to my old roommate, Tom Rocker (yes, that's his real last name), I decided that it would be good to go after the one thing that hadn't changed at all in that time: My love for a girl named Jill. So, I set out to find her.
 
That I did in the summer of 2001. She had been married, divorced, through a number of boyfriends, and was now living in State College. I got to see her a few times, and even made her a CD with tunes that made me think of her on it. On the back of that CD was a poem I'd written for her before we went our seperate ways that night. After that, we lost contact yet again, but I still didn't forget the love I felt for her.
 
The story's not over yet, my friends. I'll continue it in my next entry. But alas, life is calling, and I have to go do some design work and attend a meeting at my Fire Hall. But I assure you, it'll be interesting (at least it is to me), including me having to die for Jill to get into contact with me again. Try and figure that one out in the meantime. LOL

Simple reaction

[Misty Rious]

*hug*

.....

That's all I've got.