My Tektronix 585 is fine for a modern end table. I got it for free and it still works. :)

Because I am a mean old man, on at least one occasion I have visited the Apple store only to find someone has parked their new car in the parking lot...

How does this make me a mean old man?

When I find that mistake has been made, I run my key down the side of their car before leaving.

I have to admit, I never thought of looking for new tires, but I am not sure I am mean enough to slash someones tires...

Though I have considered smashing their windows.

I am trying to educate little darlings.