Journal: A Message from your New Commander-in-Chief

Hey all you Slashdotters, this is your President, so stop what you're doing and pay attention! I've decided, this being my first day in office, that I'd grab Slashdot by the pussy and make Slashdot Great Again! So all you spreaders of false news, Hillary voters, muslims, and other 'undesirables' can bugger the hell off, we don't need you here! Go on, shoo, shoo! Oh yeah and anyone who mods down my comments here? They get the Secret Service on their doorstep, who will grab YOU by the pussy and explain in no uncertain terms how things are now!

Alright, gotta go, Melania wants to go over fabric swatches for Whitehouse decor or somesuch shit, LOL.

P.S. you can call me 'President Pussy-Grabber' if you like, I think it's kinda catchy!