[...] note that even bite doesn't limit "cult" (mind control) to religions. many cults will use some god concept or faith as a channel or pretext, but mind control is actually a separate thing from religion and happens in many contexts. you'll notice that many of their listed characteristics apply perfectly well to other entities, like governments, ideologies, lobby groups ... i like their definition: "manipulative groups".
Yes, as I said, not all cults are religions. (And not all religions are cults -- see below.) For example, psychological cults, such as est which began in the 1970s, are generally areligious -- no god required.
i would say not all cults are religions but definitely every religion embodies some form of mind control, by definition. for good or worse, that's another matter. i guess the threshold is in "to exploit or abuse", but there are again many nuances to that!
There's nothing wrong with a group, religious or otherwise, having rules its members are expected to follow. As you say, the key issue is whether those rules are exploitative or abusive, and there's a judgement call involved with that.
Many religions just offer fellowship in a particular spiritual tradition, and don't seek to "control" the minds of their members. I'm an agnostic atheist now, but at one time I was a member of a church. They were quite low-key -- no pressure, no judgement, just nice people to worship and hang out with. I left because I grew apart from religion, not because some traumatic thing happened in the church that shook my faith. Nobody shunned me or went looking for me to get me back. I left on good terms. So, in my opinion, I experienced a church that wasn't a cult. I have no doubt there are others.