Again, more of a support problem.
I can count the amount of times RAM has suddenly had a socket fail without intervention on exactly zero hands.
That's within all of the machines within all of my datacenters.
Sure it's rare in a datacenter, but i was thinking more of things like laptops which will be moved frequently and possibly subjected to shocks. Something that's in a socket is more likely to work loose.
Also someone deploying servers in a datacenter is more likely to know what they're doing, a random consumer buying a laptop is likely to only consider the price and nothing else.
There is not an important deviation in consumption between brands.
Power usage is a pretty simple function of clock rate, fab size, and which DDR spec you're using (DDR4, DDR5, LPDDR4, LPDDR5, etc)
You mean "they use memory which isn't rate for the clock rate you're applying to it", and yes, that can absolutely happen. It does not "drag the system down". A synchronous DRAM is either stable at a certain clock rate, or it is not. Physically, this comes down to binned silicon.
The memory will be rated for a particular clock, and will usually report that rate via SPD.
Depending on where you put that memory, it may operate the memory at the clock it supports instead of what the system would prefer (thus reduced performance), or might force the memory to run at a higher clock (thus overclocking it and potentially overheating/instability). Some systems will let you adjust memory clocks/timings in the BIOS, some will not.
You also have shady memory vendors where the SPD can be reprogrammed to report a higher clock.
But yes, with replaceable parts you have potentially infinite variables to consider. With fixed parts you take those variables away and have a single known good configuration.