I, for one, live in fear of the coronavirus. It's a deadly virus! I ALWAYS wear my muzzle, my tinfoil hat, my CoviDildo(tm) approved buttplug, and my WWJD bracelet on my left (not right!) wrist. We're talking cutting edge, totally science-based protection!
But even tho I wear PPE and follow religiously all the recommendations, guidelines, and petty diktats promulgated by Enemy of Humanity Anthony Fauci - I know I'm still not safe. In fact I'm hiding under my bed right now! Are you hiding under your bed, too? You should be. If not, you're a granny killer!!
People, we're just not taking this seriously enough. The only way to fight coronavirus is with human rights atrocities - that's the settled science. Why aren't we torturing people more?! Did you know that in some states people are still allowed to *breathe air* without a filthy diaper strapped to their face. The nerve of those selfish granny killers!
Sure, sure, tyrant Adolph Cuomo and tyrant Gavinito Newssolini are doing good work in this field. But I'm very worried that somewhere in America, someone - we'll find those bastards - is enjoying life. Only abject human misery can fight the coronavirus. It's the science.
Did you that if you catch the coronavirus, you have only 99.7% Chance of survival? 99.7%! Wake up people - this is a deadly virus!! OMG we're all gonna die!