Comment Advanced directives are a must (Score 4, Interesting) 646
My mother died last month. She was a physician who worked primarily with elderly patients in nursing homes so for her losing a patient was a regular occurrence. She had a bad bout of pneumonia and her lungs were not recovering, so I had to make the hard choice whether or not to put her on a ventilator in order to keep her alive. My justification was that the respirator would only be used for a short time in order to give her lungs a chance to heal and recover. When it became apparent that she was not recovering, I had to make the decision to remove it and allow her to die naturally (it took less than an hour).
My mom did not have an advanced directive specifying what kind of care she wished to receive if she were unable to choose for herself. This made my decisions very painful and difficult. I remembered the conversations I had with her about her caring for her own patients and how sometimes the families of her patients would request extreme measures at the end of life, and how this would contrast with borderline neglect during the patient's life.
My mom also was opposed to assisted suicide. That much I knew. She felt life was a gift that shouldn't be wasted or rejected.
In my mother's case, it was clear that if she were to survive she would need to be on the ventilator for an extended period of time, and enough time would pass that she would deteriorate physically due to being immobile in a hospital bed. Also, she was in the early stages of Parkinson's and it was almost a given that this violent shock to her system would result in an acceleration of its effects.
Knowing that if she did recover her quality of life would be greatly reduced, I made the tough choice to let her go. One advantage of this was that I was able to hold hand, stroke her hair, and sing to her as she died surrounded by family. She was 73. I encourage everyone regardless of age to set up an advance directive determining the level of care they wish to have. It wouldn't have prevented my situation, but it would have made it easier if I knew ahead of time what mom wanted.
My mom did not have an advanced directive specifying what kind of care she wished to receive if she were unable to choose for herself. This made my decisions very painful and difficult. I remembered the conversations I had with her about her caring for her own patients and how sometimes the families of her patients would request extreme measures at the end of life, and how this would contrast with borderline neglect during the patient's life.
My mom also was opposed to assisted suicide. That much I knew. She felt life was a gift that shouldn't be wasted or rejected.
In my mother's case, it was clear that if she were to survive she would need to be on the ventilator for an extended period of time, and enough time would pass that she would deteriorate physically due to being immobile in a hospital bed. Also, she was in the early stages of Parkinson's and it was almost a given that this violent shock to her system would result in an acceleration of its effects.
Knowing that if she did recover her quality of life would be greatly reduced, I made the tough choice to let her go. One advantage of this was that I was able to hold hand, stroke her hair, and sing to her as she died surrounded by family. She was 73. I encourage everyone regardless of age to set up an advance directive determining the level of care they wish to have. It wouldn't have prevented my situation, but it would have made it easier if I knew ahead of time what mom wanted.