He does need to apply a little math there. Dragging a net behind might happen due to (weak) atmospheric friction, but you're not going to sneak up behind debris and gently catch it in the net. Something in a lower orbit is moving faster relative to you, so the debris will come from 'behind'.

Also, you're going to be waving a huge net around and hope to only get close enough to things that are traveling at speeds which are only slightly different. Somehow you have to not catch working equipment, and not get smacked by something in a path at 90 or 180 degrees. That's worse than praying for a magical 18,000 carom path.

When you do catch something, it's not going hit right in the center of gravity so your whole contraption goes spinning. The first time that happens, your net might close around what might be in it. But it won't stop without a lot of fuel. And if you don't stop it yet somehow manage to intercept something else the something else will hit the outside of your net purse and send it spinning in another direction. If you do stop the spinning and reopen the net, the movement of opening will push your catch out and away.

That's assuming you can actually catch anything. It's more likely that you'll blunder into the path of things moving in the wrong direction. Then the debris will be increased by bits of stuff that got hit, followed shortly by whatever is torn off by the stresses of the net trying to head off in another direction (assuming your net got hit and not your garbage trawler).

Go look up the designs which others have done. Nets which are intended to vaporize or slow debris, electromagnetic drives, including deorbiters on new satellites.

And, no, don't think Quark. Think Planetes.

Yes, we should have already seen six more rovers die. Why hasn't it happened?

That's how a rover which was designed to be cheap and lightweight would have become a multiton semi-mobile laboratory. Adding on accessories and desirable features, then stronger equipment to carry it all, is how much larger and more expensive space probes are created. Problems with such designs caused smaller and simpler designs to be favored. But... why aren't there six more of these things wandering around by now?

Well, as long as the Pioneer Anomaly does not involve dysentery... carry on.

The director's commentary is to die for.

But I don't want lightweight protection. I want a lot of steel and guns. And armed drones with packet sniffers. And K-9 units with dowsing rods.

They may have copied it. But it wouldn't be the first time. A dirty, dark secret of Google's is that their main product, a search engine was a copy of AltaVista, which also had the dirty secret of being a copy of Aliweb.

Except that Google used content searching and information about links, while AltaVista used full-word content searching with many spiders, while Aliweb avoided spiders and used indexed descriptions rather than content. So other than being different, they were copies?

I assume you're providing the public web service, internal network services, and the product operation (irrigation management) services. So provide a summary of those three fields.

The executive-level statistics for the public web service will be easy to choose: How good is the service and when is improvement necessary? As will the internal services... summarize the measurable bottlenecks, including network disk space usage. Provide a number (or rescale it to a 0-10 rating) and a sentence which explains its meaning and/or how to interpret it ("Smaller is better, and the goal is less than 1 second per request.")

For the irrigation management service, because that is in almost direct support of the customers, you should learn how the process works from the customer's point of view (Are my sprinklers working? How much am I saving?) and from the company's point of view (server capacity, money saved by average customer, estimate of customers unable to connect to server, server requirements per customer). Some of the info may be of interest to different departments: IT, Irrigation Maintenance, Design, Sales, or Accounting. Then see what you can measure and decide what to report... and what to request in order to add more information.